Fair Trade
by WhitenyRose
Summary: Kakashi is sent on a mission, one he shouldnt be able to survive. Before he leaves the Hokage hands him a scroll, telling him not to open it unless he has no other choice. This will be a Kakashi/Iruka yaoi fan fic.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: This is the revised version! I still did not have this beta'd, however it should be alright (I hope). If you would like to beta for me, that would be wonderful (seriously). If the summary sucked, I apologize; I'm still pretty new to this. I really hope you enjoy reading this. Even if I do say so myself, I like it well enough.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Any of it. Not a single piece.

Fair Trade

Chapter 1

"Yes, ma'am," her blonde eyebrow twitched in mild annoyance. "Yes, Tsunade-sama." He amended. "I understand that you have not asked me to undertake this mission that I probably shouldn't even know about it. Therefore, I so humbly volunteer." Kakashi's showing eye curved into a half-moon, he smiled hoping to charm the Hokage.

"Listen, Kakashi, we both know there's no coming back from a mission like this. Whoever goes in won't be coming out. You," she sighed, "are too nosy for your own good sometimes." The Hokage sat at her desk, head in hand, eyes narrowed to slits, glancing at him from under her lashes. "Very well, I'll consider it. You do realize, however much I want to solve this issue, I wasn't about to send anyone to their death. " She sat up straight in her chair, looking him straight in the eye, "I'm telling you this so that you will understand, you may change your mind; however, if you still wish still to accept tomorrow, I will have a meeting of the Elder's to discuss specifics. If it is agreed that the mission is of as much importance as it seems, you will receive your orders post haste." She stared intently, waiting for his reaction.

"Yes, ma'am, that would be best I believe." He smiled as her eyebrow twitched for the second time. "Then, I will await your orders." He saluted and with that Kakashi leapt from the window ledge where he had been crouching.

Tsunade followed his progress with her eyes momentarily before shifting back in her seat. She groaned. "Shizune! SHIZUNE!" she thundered, "Where is my sake!?"

Tsunade waited a moment while her aggravated assistant arrived. The door opened, a medical file was thrown in her face, and Shizune exited. "No sake?" Tsunade asked the closed door, "Damn." She didn't have the energy to spare after learning she'd be sending Kakashi to his death. "Damn, damn, damn." Oh, well, she thought, nothing to do now but continue.

Placing her hand on a summoning seal on her desk top, Tsunade scribbled a quick note which she then handed to the masked ANBU who appeared before her. "Deliver this please. Quickly if you don't mind." The ANBU nodded and disappeared as quickly and quietly as he had come. Tsunade picked up the folder Shizune had tossed at her and flipped it open. Her eyes quickly scanned the page.

"Shizune! What do you mean by giving me a medical case for chronic diarrhea!? Come deal with this yourself or get someone else to do it! I have more important things to deal with!" Tsunade stood angrily and marched to the door. "Take this folder and get me some goddamn sake!" She thrust her arm out the door. Shizune stomped up and snatched it from the Hokage.

"Get your own sake! We all have more important things to be doing." Then she walked off.

"Hey, get back here!"

=^.^=

Kakashi was already three rooftops away when he heard Tsunade yell. He paused momentarily, and when he figured the yelling wasn't directed at him he moved on. Tsunade really is one for tantrums, he thought, I wonder what set her off this time? If it was me, I'm glad she's yelling at someone else instead.

Arriving at his apartment Kakashi looked around the bleak interior. Every time he decided to accept a suicide mission, he inventoried his stuff, his weapons, and his life. He made sure everything was in order; no lose ends, relational or otherwise. He always left believing he wouldn't come back. It made it easier. Of course it also made life in general more impersonal. No real ties to anyone or anything. Not that he minded. He was a shinobi. As far as he was concerned, that was the point.

Kakashi sighed. Well I'd like to tell myself that anyway. But now, he thought, I have Naruto and Sakura. But they're grown enough, I don't have to worry. And it was true. They were already well on their way to becoming some of the best shinobi the world had ever known. Kakashi saw them from time to time but simply not enough to justify any reluctance toward this mission. He would have liked to stay in Konoha, he would have liked to always be there for his team, but he was a shinobi, before he was anything else. Sometimes he regretted that.

Still, he couldn't let that affect him, not today. He hadn't seen Naruto or Sakura in well over a year, he reminded himself. Again. His village and his people were in need and he wanted, no, he needed to do everything in his power to help. Kakashi had been inactive for too long. Sure, he'd been on missions, more than enough missions, but no real danger, no real excitement. Adrenaline junky that he was, this everyday cat-in-tree thing was wearing thin. Kakashi was a shinobi and shinobi lived to help; they lived to face dangers that terrified civilians would never face. Kakashi was a shinobi and he wanted to risk his life for something important.

I feel like a pansy, thinking to myself like this. He shook his head. Pull yourself together. Train for the next couple days, prepare yourself, and plan your route of entry. Hey, don't even have to worry about an escape route. Just get in and handle the mission. Simple as that. Kakashi knew that he would be the only readily available shinobi with the ability to complete this mission. No one else could get close. Even he wouldn't get out alive. Sucked to be him. Oh well, he'd asked for it. No reason to complain now.

Sighing to himself Kakashi crossed his room. He pulled his photo album from the drawer and tossed it on the bed. He proceeded to pull out a change of clothes and half the weapons stashed in secret corners, drawers, safes, under the bed…. "No reason not to get packed and ready," he said out loud to no one in particular. "Tsunade wants to believe we will have time to discuss the best course of action but, we all know that we don't have that much time. At the most I'll have three days."

"At the most, three days." The empty room practically ran with the words. "Three days."

He looked out the window. It was mid-afternoon. The sun was hitting the floor just inside the window frame, fully lighting his room without blinding him. He could hear the sounds of the city, the people and their pets. And beyond that in the distance, he could hear the sounds of the forest, the birds and animals. It was nice. Calm. Normal. It was boring. That's why he needed this mission.

Unfortunately, that meant he still had a bit of a wait. Today, he'd already been through his morning workout before he'd decided to spy on Tsunade. He could always train or workout some more.

Kakashi sighed again, maybe it would become his new habit. He turned back to his room, such a contrast to the city. Boring in its own right perhaps, but sterile, different, separate. He saw his already folded clothes and prepared weaponry. In less than thirty seconds he could be ready to go. This had only taken him two minutes anyway. Pathetic, ready to leave at any moment, but obviously, he was a shinobi.

Kakashi reached into his back pocket to assure himself that his reading material was on his person before he headed for the door. Outside in the sunlight, he squinted up at the sun, and then turned left toward the closest city wall. He was looking for a nice tree, with a good amount of shade; one preferably just outside the city. Read 'til I get bored, then train to my heart's content. Hopefully they don't spend three days deciding. I won't know what to do with myself for three days. The new Icha Icha book doesn't come out for another month and I'm almost done with this one. Kakashi settled himself underneath the tree. "Maa….. I'll figure it out." He pulled out the book and opened to the bookmarked page.

Another Author's Note: So I hope you liked it. And I hope you liked it and will want to read more. I promise I will write more (meaning past ch 11). Please, please, please, plllleeeeaaasssssseee review. If you don't like it and review that's cool too. Any constructive criticism would be wonderful. Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Ok, so I very well may get some technical things wrong, stuff that doesn't quite match up with the Naruto story line. Some of that will be because I wanted to but, not all of it, so feel free to mention anything you notice. I'm not actually trying to change anything, the story is supposed to be after the manga maybe, or maybe just kinda in there somewhere. It doesn't really tie into anything. I may use a few honorifics but, even though I should, I obviously won't be using them very often, pretty much only when I feel they are necessary (if this reeeeaaallly bothers you let me know and I will possibly attempt to change it, if you can convince me, I'm lazy with a Z). I will stop rambling now and let you read, of course that requires that you read this part .

Ps. I didn't specify about the mission so that I could make the first chapter mysterious. Dumb I know, but there you are. Anyway, I tell you in this chapter so it wasn't mysterious for long.

Warning: So, I forgot this last time. There is mild language, at least I think it's mild; hence, the teen rating. I'll probably have to eventually mark this mature but, not yet.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto. If I did, it would have loooooots of problems. But still….

Fair Trade

Chapter 2

Tsunade's eyebrow was twitching at a once per every two second rate. Her anger was verging on palpable. Her reason? Well, she's Tsunade, what did you expect? Seriously though, her anger was not unwarranted. The Elders were a group of bigoted, socialite, prejudiced, grudge holding, ass-wipes. Ok. Exaggeration. But they were not a wonderful group of people.

_Old people do not understand the meaning of the words: the appropriate time. They think they can do whatever they want, whenever they want. _She growled. _No, I do not count. I am not old. I'm reasonable and level headed. Not to mention I can kick these geezers' ass's three times around the city without working up a sweat. _She was lying to herself; quite a bit, actually. But it did make her feel better.

Tsunade, sitting at the head of the table as her station dictated, leaned forward and crossed her arms on the table's cool and smooth surface. "I do think that Kakashi will be the right choice for this mission. Who better to assassinate—" the Elder on Tsunade's left, three seats down said.

"I'd have to agree," said the Elder across from her. "We cannot send a whole team and the sharingan is essential, crucial."

"Well, I don't see any reason why not. We'd have to ask him of course but, there should be no reason for the man to decline—"

"Why, yes, that should be helpful information, we will have to tell him before he leaves."

"And, knowing Kakashi, he'll be ready to go within minutes."

"Wonderful plan, truly wonderful. Being his father's son he shouldn't need any help from us. All we have to do is send him off."

And there it was. The source of Tsunade's anger. They all remembered Kakashi as his father's son, instead of as the ninja he was. Kakashi should not be judged by these old cronies who were blinded by their own experiences. Age may bring wisdom, but it also brings complacency, and breeds discontent and unhappiness. _Bah. Some old people cost more than their worth. Especially the self-righteous ones._ Tsunade tilted her head down and to the side in an attempt to muffle her growing rage.

"I have made it perfectly clear that this mission is a suicide mission, correct?" The heads of those around the table nodded. "And everyone agrees that the mission is important enough to lose the agent." Again more nods. Tsunade's voice rose in volume, "And everyone is willing to lose the infamous Copy Nin because the mission seems so important." Less vigorous nodding but, still, they all nodded. She deflated into her chair.

_If it were someone they liked personally the answer would be different. Anyway, it's not even their decision, its Kakashi's. _Sighing she looked around the room. "Kakashi has already been briefed. He has agreed to die for Konoha, as a Konoha shinobi."

Relief and excitement crossed the faces of the attending Elders. The older lady sitting directly in the center to the left clapped her hands together once and rose from her seat. "It's all settled then," she said. "All that's left is to gather as much intelligence in the next few hours as we can, and wish Kakashi fare-well." She stepped back from the table pushing her chair with her.

The others followed suit, Tsunade paused before standing as well. "It's decided." She spoke quietly to herself. She looked around the now vacated room. Standing straighter she marched to the sliding door. "SHIZUNE! Meet me in my office with sake!"

When answered with an immediate 'yes, ma'am', Tsunade shuddered. She had already won more in today's lottery than she should have. All signs pointed to misfortune. She sighed again. It was becoming an annoying, yet comforting, habit. She headed for her office.

Tsunade paced across her office floor, hoping that she could settle herself enough to talk to Kakashi. To order him to his death. She shook her head violently as if trying to banish the thought. But it wouldn't leave. The thought, the image, played in her head. The voices of the Elders played and replayed, taunting her. She liked Kakashi. As a friend of course, but he was a close friend. And to be completely honest she wanted to tell him and all the Elders to: _suck my dick, hell, noooo, he's not going anywhere. Not if I have anything to say about it. But, we do need the information, and I can't really stop him, he's agreed and the Elders have agreed but it just makes me so—_

"Tsunade-sama?" While she'd been preoccupied with her own thoughts a young, in his late-twenties, shinobi had entered. She stopped pacing and faced him, eyebrow raised.

He started in a rush, "Listen, I know I'm just supposed to write stuff down and keep my mouth shut but, I don't like this sending Kakashi to his death thing. And from your reaction, I'd say you don't like it much either."

"No, I don't like it. But what am I supposed to do? Kakashi agreed; insisted actually. We both know how he is, now that he doesn't have direct responsibility for a team, and Naruto and Sakura are really growing up, his life means less to him again. He lost his strings, his attachment. If Naruto were here, or even Sakura we might be able to get him to reconsider but with the way things are now," she sighed (again), "we have no chance of stopping him."

"Well, I have an idea." Chocolate eyes met Tsunade's hazel ones.

"Planning to share, or just stand there."

"Give him this." The young man held out a purple and green, wax sealed scroll.

"Nope. No way in Hell Am I Gonna LET YOU GIVE HIM THAT!"

The man didn't even flinch. "Well, it's not your decision. I could always just give it to him."

Tsunade's pupils were dilated and her breath hissed between her clenched teeth. _Today needs to be over. Right NOW. _"So, then, we give him the scroll, then what? You die there instead of him? That isn't really a better option. I—"

The man smiled. "I can get out. This thing," he waved the scroll in his hand, "was made for a reason, you know? No, I can't get in. I can't kill the new Mizukage, but I can escape. I can get out alive. It's perfect." He smiled, bringing his hand up to his head and scratching habitually.

"Fine, damn it. Fine." She held out her hand. "Give me the scroll before I realize how stupid everyone is being." The scroll exchanged hands.

"You have to make sure he knows how to engage the seal. And how to activate it using his blood and—"

"I know. I'm in possession of one of these damn things. I'll make sure he knows what he's doing." Pointing to the door, she spoke, "Now get out of here and teach children or something." And with that, the man left through the door he had entered.

Tsunade smiled. _Well, it's better than nothing._

=^.^=

He had finished talking to Tsunade at approximately 8:45 am, which meant if the meeting of the Elders had been called quickly, he wouldn't have long to wait. Four hours of discussion tops, another hour for the Hokage to cool off, and another for any and all useful information to be gathered. That meant he'd get his assignment tonight and he could leave at first light. This was best. No time for emotion. Even weak emotion, _any_ emotion would become a hindrance.

Stretching, he turned his body this way and that to relax after the cool down run he'd done after training. He gazed from his balcony over the wall and the forest at the sunset. It was a quiet night, anything could happen. He breathed deeply, his self-inventory running through physical and mental checks. He was ready for this. He was prepared for whatever awaited him.

At a light noise to his right he turned. An ANBU held out a sealed missive. Kakashi took it, nodding ever so slightly. _This is it, _he thought, _no more waiting._ After scanning the page he flashed his hands through a few signs and transported himself.

In the Hokage's office, he stood at attention before her desk. She sighed. _She's been sighing a lot lately. Odd, _he thought. The Hokage leaned back in her chair arms crossed beneath her breasts. "I don't like this. I do not want to send you on this mission, but it seems I have been out voted."

She handed him a flat file folder with no more than ten pages in it. Information of this kind was scarce. "You head out in the morning. Any and all preparations or plans are left to your judgment. And this." She held out the purple and green, wax sealed scroll. "Before you leave put a drop of your blood on the wax seal and let it dry. The seal inside is seven pronged and will activate similarly to Naruto's. Do not use this until the last minute. Not until after your mission is complete. Hopefully, this will save your life."

Kakashi looked down at the scroll in disbelief. Tsunade nodded. It was legit. He tucked it into the pouch on his left hip. "Thank you." They both knew the significance of hope, even hope that was full of holes and covered in shadows.

Tsunade cleared her throat and stood straight, "Thank you, Kakashi. Konoha sends you to The Land of Mist and Fog."

Another Author's Note: Thank you first reviewers, Kick-Aft and Ruon jian! I love you! In a totally not sexual way. Yes, I actually said that. Yes, I'm very weird. Please excuse my behavior. Anyway, if you haven't reviewed please do. If you have, don't feel any pressure but I'd love to hear from you again. Sorry about the short chapters, I haven't the patience to write longer ones (again if you wish to convince me otherwise, feel free). And 'beta'ing. Yep. I believe that is it. Until next time, whenever that happens to be.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: If you're still reading, that is so totally awesome. Thank you! I'm sorry if this is still a little slow, it'll pick up I promise.

Warning: Some language and violence (I think it's still teen, there's violence so be warned, I don't think it's too graphic yet).

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto… but I don't.

Fair Trade

Chapter 3

Kakashi squatted above the mist soaked ground. _Mist. Yeah, right. More like perpetual rain. They're just so used to it they think its light mist. I'm gonna be wet for the rest of my life._ He sighed and then shifted. _The rest of my life. Two days. That's optimistic. _Unconsciously, his hand traveled to his left hip where the scroll was hidden in a waterproof pack. _Or maybe not._

He sighed again. Maybe he was picking up Tsunade's habit. _No point in getting my hopes up. I just have to focus on killing the Mizukage. Then I can worry about everything else._ Kakashi scanned his surroundings. The further he traveled into the Land of Mist, the harder it was to tell which direction he was going. The closer he got to the cities, the more his instincts urged him to turn and walk past. It was a chakra based defense. It was flawlessly juxtaposed with the water that fell continuously from the sky. Even when it wasn't raining, the water on and around the islands worked to confuse and distract enemies.

His hand reached out and tapped his left hip. He glanced around. He'd made it far enough, he'd been island hopping, traveling across the shortest expanses of water possible. Some of the islands had been nice enough. The sun was shining and the defenses were only mildly uncomfortable. Nothing like this. He wasn't on the main island of the Land of Mist, no, the Mizukage no longer resided in the main village, The Village Hidden in Mist. He'd moved his residence and all his trusted companions to a secure location. The man was paranoid and for good reason. He'd killed his predecessor and revived the evil traditions of the past. He was a feared man. He was not loved. The newest generation of shinobi to rise from The Land of Mist was as twisted and warped as Zabuza. The children fought to live, killed to live, and their humanity was brutalized until they were machines lacking true human emotion.

Everyone, the known world, had agreed that this new Mizukage needed to die. But he had taken power then, hidden himself from view too quickly. His whereabouts had been unknown. That was, until two days ago. Konoha allies within the Land of Mist had sent furtive messages over the last year or so, with clues to the Mizukage's residence, and the times he most frequented his home. The pieces had finally fallen into place. The timing had been ideal. The Mizukage was in his residence and he wouldn't be expecting an attack. At least an attack of consequence.

The Mizukage had moved to a small island directly south of the main island of The Land of Mist. Here it rained perpetually; therefore, the land's defenses were that much stronger. A sensible place for a man who feared assassination. Unless you lived or knew the signs to travel safely into the heart of the mist, there was no way to come out alive.

This was why Kakashi was the only one who could complete this mission. His sharingan could read the justu that permeated the mist around him. Now, he had traveled as far as he could without activating his sharingan. If he tried to continue he would be lost in the mist or killed by sentries as his presence was detected.

He reached down one more time and checked his pouch to make sure it was there. Then he lifted his hand to his hitai-ate and pulled it up, leaving his face mask covering his mouth and nose. His normal right eye closed and he focused the sharingan on the jutsu only he could see. Almost immediately his hands flashed performing the signs to neutralize the jutsu.

As soon as he finished signing, the oppressive weight of the mist lifted and he sighed (yet again). He tapped his left hip again. Pulling his hitai-ate back over his left eye, he continued through the barely visible forest. Leaping into the air, Kakashi landed on a branch ten feet above where he had been standing. He had about a mile to go until he reached the Mizukage's hide-away.

He pushed off. Landing on a branch another ten feet away, ten feet towards his destination. He pushed off again. There was only one way to describe the way he felt now. _Apathetic. I can't make myself care anymore._ He pushed off again. _I'm in limbo. Between people, between living and dying. I'm alive but, I do not live. I work but, I do not strive. This is what I've become, _he thought. _There is no excuse. It's why I volunteered for this mission. What the hell is wrong with me? How can I look at my own life, think things like this about myself and still be unable to care. I know that I should change, that I could change, but I feel cold._

_Maa… I don't even care. Let's just get this over with. _Kakashi dropped from the trees, the top most roof of the building visible through the quickly dissipating fog. The trees were thinning and the fog refused to touch the home. From all appearances, this was the only place on the whole island that had been touched by sunlight in the last year.

Kakashi tapped the pouch on his left hip. His fingers drumming nervously. The defenses were stronger here rather than weaker, even though the chakra filled rain was absent. At the edge of the forest Kakashi paused again, he crouched in the shrubs watching to see if guards were patrolling the perimeter.

Raising his hitai-ate again, he closed his right eye and focused on the jutsu before him. He could see that there was a patrol but that it was less frequent than he would have thought. _One every forty-five minutes or so. Plenty of time. _He smirked. _I might even make it back out. _His mouth turned down bitterly. _Yeah, far enough out to die in the forest. Maa….. No time for this._

Kakashi pulled a kunai from the pouch on his hip, feeling the scroll as he did; then he sat back to wait. Knock out one guard and he'd have an assured half hour to find the Mizukage, any longer and he would run the risk of getting caught. _Still thinking like I'm gonna get out. The first foot I set inside the house will set off alarms I wouldn't be able to stop. Five minutes. Ten if I'm lucky._

_There he is. _A guard was heading toward him from the right; the man looked relaxed, safe. Instead of encouraging Kakashi it made him even more nervous. A Kage guard was not relaxed unless he wasn't the threat to worry about. The guard's demeanor preluded the traps and dangers inside the home.

_Here we go. _He leapt from the ground seconds after the guard passed. From behind the guard he reached forward with his right arm extended, kunai leading. The paper thin edge of the blade slid across the man's throat. Blood sprayed to the right following the path of the blade as it was drawn back. Not even looking at the fallen man, Kakashi brought the blade back to him across the dying man's collar to clean the blade. Old habits die hard. Clean weapons are a necessity. Shinobi training, the blood that runs in the veins of ninja.

Running to the nearest window, he placed fingers against the glass and pushed lightly, seeing if it would open. It did. Kakashi drew in a nervous breath. Things were looking worse. Still no real security measures. Not a good sign. He breathed slowly, tapped his hip and slid himself through the window. No one was inside, not that he was expecting someone.

One door. _Guess I'm taking that door then._ He stepped into the hallway outside. Genjutsu, distant and ineffective illusions glittered around the walls. _Maa….. Here's where the real test starts. _Moving quickly to the furthest door he opened it and felt the houses internal alarms activate. _And I still have no clue where the Mizukage is. Wonderful. _He sped up making it to the next door as quickly as possible.

_The center. He'll probably be in the center of the house. Upstairs too. Stairs would be nice…. Ahhhh. Stairs; perfect timing. _He climbed the stairs four at a time. At the top he glanced out the window. _Good, I'm on the top floor. _He stepped forward only to fall flat.

His feet wouldn't move.

His. Feet. Wouldn't. MOVE.

He glanced down. Jutsu in the floor. Hidden until pressure triggered it.

Not good.

He heard the house move.

The House.

_Shit. What the hell was that?_

Either every person in the house had started running towards him or the floor boards in the house were trying to attack him. Or both.

Both looked about right.

Chakra laced in the wood floors was seeping to the surface, all of it pooling near his feet. The voices of hundreds of guards were getting closer.

He focused his chakra to the soles of his feet. No good. The chakra in the floor was enough to neutralize it. _Shit._ He looked up. _Shit. They are on the other side of that door._ He flooded his feet with chakra. _No good. Shit._

The first two men burst through the door. The hallway prevented any others from entering quickly to attack him. But they would be able to attack soon. Too soon. The man in the lead hit Kakashi full force. Slammed him back into the floor.

Pain, intense shooting pain closed both Kakashi's eyes. His head felt split. The hand that had locked around his throat tightened and he gagged. His head swam. Pain. Lack of oxygen. So far, this wasn't going well. He blinked his watering eyes open.

The second guard took his exposed kunai and pinned one of Kakashi's flailing arms to the floor. A third man pinned his other one. Skewered, held to the floor Kakashi tried to twist away. Impossible. Feet; stuck. Neck; pinned. Hands; he felt tiny bones break. Pain. He didn't want to think about his hands. His eyes barely open and tear filled scanned wildly around the narrow hallway. More and more and more men packed themselves into the enclosed space. Kakashi's window of escape was shrinking with each addition. The hard edge of the scroll dug into his hip.

A fist slammed into his face. Spots danced before his eyes. His head crushed into the wood, splintering it. _No more. _Kakashi felt dread settle in his stomach. Closing his eyes Kakashi focused on breathing. In through his broken nose, _don't think about it, _out through his swollen lips.

_Distance yourself from the pain. Let it flow around you, notice it but do not let it affect you. _He felt a weight on his chest. Unbearable pressure.

Snap. SNAAAAAAAP. SNAP. Snap. _Breathe. Ouch!_ Kakashi felt his left lung deflate. _Calm, _he thought. _The Mizukage. You have to kill the Mizukage. _He gagged.

Blood. From his nose.

Lack of oxygen.

Pain.

Silence.

He sighed in relief as mild shock dulled the pain but left him clear-headed enough to plan his next move. _Can't let them break much more or I won't be able to crawl fast enough to kill the Mizukage. Think. If justu won't free you then maybe extreme physical force will counteract the jutsu in the floor._

Swiftly arching his back. Trying to ignore his screaming chest and hands, he drove his feet through the floor boards. He felt the jutsu retreat. Success!

Freeing his wounded and fortunately unwatched hands, he flew through substitution justu signs, trading places with the vase in the hallway before him.

_The majority of the guards will have been near the Mizukage. Which direction? _Using his sharingan, he looked for the highest concentration of personnel activity and protective jutsu. _That way._

He turned right. Then right again. He didn't have time to stop. They were close behind him. He only had seconds to decide. If he took too many seconds, he'd be caught again.

Left.

_That door. He has to be behind that door._

The door was ornately carved. And larger than any door he had seen yet.

Flashing through the hand signs to open the jutsu on the door, Kakashi darted in and closed the door quickly, reactivating the jutsu lock.

He breathed. A real breath. The first in minutes.

Pulling out a kunai, he advanced several steps. The room was dark, gloomy and smelled faintly of smoke and something else.

Another step.

Kakashi froze.

Another Author's Note: So, I know the full name is The Land of Mist and Fog but it's too long so I shortened it to The Land of Mist (obviously). Sorry if that bothers anyone. I'm not sure how the fighting went but I hope you like it. Oh, this will be switched to mature for the next chapter for serious violence. Feel free to critique.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: I think I'm doing a pretty good job updating. Hopefully I keep it up. Sorry this one took a little longer though, I wasn't sure how to write it. Oh and I believe the little time changes are clear however if you get confused I will be happy to clarify, or I'll even go back and mark stuff.

Warning: Rating changed to Mature for a reason. Violence, including torture and non-consensual sexual relations, well, really just creepy gross descriptions of past violence and sex.

Disclaimer: Nope, not yet. It's all still Kishimoto's.

Fair Trade

Chapter 4

His back hit the cold concrete of the wall behind him with a wet slap. The cold raced down his spine and though normally it would have been uncomfortable, at this moment the intense feeling gave him comfort. It contrasted the pain. The dull aches that would form bruises, the sharp stinging of cuts, the stabbing, hot pain of broken bones. Each pain was distinctive and yet, they all ran together; made his stomach turn. He leaned forward over the broken arm he clutched protectively to his stomach.

Pain lanced his lung. Kakashi unbent his body, straightened as much as was possible and drew in a breath through his nose. And another. He closed his eyes and softly let his head rest back on the cold surface. The incessant rain fell on his face helping the wall beneath him to calm him. Kakashi's pain induced headache began to fade. He was in need of a plan. Some plan. Any plan. Anything to get him out of here alive.

Taking another deep breath he reopened his eyes and focused on the wall before him. He had dropped himself into an alley. He had hidden himself well enough to buy a few minutes of quiet. He didn't have long but possibly just long enough. On the wall opposite, hung a bent, torn and dripping poster. Without preemptive thought his sharingan focused on the faded picture.

As the face on the poster became visible to his enhanced vision, he recoiled. A shudder ran through his already shivering frame.

He knew that face. He had seen it mere minutes before. His stomach roiled and he hunched again. Memories, far too fresh and unprecedented, flooded his mind. He retched. Covered his mouth and retched again.

Evil. The man was completely and utterly cruel.

=^.^=

Kakashi froze.

Shinobi senses can keep you alive. But every once in a while you will curse being able to see well in almost darkness, being able to hear the smallest sounds, being able to smell scents that are normally indistinguishable, and being able to analyze every piece of information delivered to your brain.

For Kakashi this was one of those times.

He wished whole heartedly that he could un-see, un-hear, un-smell and unanalyzed the scene before him.

Blood.

His, but someone else's blood was here too.

Sex.

Probably none consensual sex, in other words, a horrific amount of rape.

Layer upon layer of the smell of sex. Old progressing to new, recent, now. The room was not truly dirty. It was clean. But it _felt_ unclean. Unwashed. Kakashi wanted nothing more than to turn around and leave.

He could see very little within the gloom, he knew that one more step would take him beyond the indent in which the doorway was set, and into the light of the single candle. The candle light flickered somewhere to the right far enough from the door to light only the small space near where it sat. The oppressive darkness of the room ate the edges of the light, the shadows beyond the forgiving circle grew long.

He could sense the others in the room with him. The Mizukage, he was sure, and another. The other was not a threat, whoever it was probably wouldn't leave this room alive even if the best medical ninja were there to help.

The blood was theirs. Whoever they were.

After lightly resting his hand on his hip, checking the scroll, he stepped forward, blade in hand.

Involuntarily, Kakashi curled forward, legs buckling. He gagged. After a moment he regained enough internal balance to lift his head. He gagged again, moving his hand to his mouth in an attempt to fight his body's reaction.

Almost directly opposite Kakashi, on the wall, hung a woman. If he hadn't known better he would have thought she was simply standing. She wasn't suspended more than an inch above what would have been her normal standing height. And yet, it would be inaccurate to describe her in any other way; she was hung.

Her arms and legs were stretched to the sides, directly parallel with the floor, and each was secured by a metal and leather strap. As if in assurance, a stake had been driven through each of her wrists, each of her shoulders and each of her ankles. Though the straps held some of her weight, much of it was distributed to the spikes. The pressure was obviously pulling and reopening the wounds every few minutes.

The woman had been there long enough that the blood had seeped around the spikes, down her naked body and to the floor.

But this wasn't what turned Kakashi's stomach. The sight was gruesome enough but it wasn't worse than what had almost been done to him minutes before. His sharingan whirred. He could read the order and the time of each wound on the girl.

Kakashi would bet that a few of the woman's ribs were broken, probably multiple bones in her hands and feet as well. But, still what struck Kakashi were the woman's clearly broken and mutilated hips and her irreversibly scared face.

Two more straps held the woman's legs, these were set close to her hips. To make this as clear as possible, if Kakashi had walked up to the woman, his hips would have been within inches of hers. She was at the perfect height to fuck. Apparently though, for further convenience, someone by the order of the Mizukage had broken her hips. They faced unnaturally. Where they should have faced slightly out and down, they faced completely out and slightly up. Even through the gloom Kakashi could see the blood pooling inside the woman's abdomen turning it a dark purple. The blood also ran down her hip to the wall and joined the pools already collecting on the floor.

However cruel this may seem, the Mizukage's finishing touch to his work was what had broken Kakashi's normally calm mask. The man had taken a hot metal rod to the girl. The marks covered her body. Some of her fingers and toes were melded together. But it didn't stop there. He had taken that same hot rod and melded her lower lips to the skin of her legs, burned her nipples and most of the woman's breasts completely off. What appeared to be fat and blood ran down her stomach.

Then he had gone for her face. The Mizukage had melted her lips together then proceeded to sew them shut. When this hadn't kept her totally quiet he stabbed a needle through her larynx. Then he fixed her eyes open with metal clamps . Finally, he scalped half her head.

The woman had once been beautiful. Her skin, even in the light, and covered as it was still held some essence of former vitality. The half of her hair that remained was long, flowing and luxurious, though now horribly matted. Her eyes, though vacant and red rimmed, were a clear deep brown. She must have been beautiful. Now, she was little more than carrion.

Kakashi finally composed himself and straightened, and still it took him another minute to tear his eyes away from the woman.

He turned instead toward the light.

The candle sat on the nightstand next to a large four-poster, dark wood bed. The Mizukage sat resting against the headboard, turning a knife in his hands, what appeared to be the woman's hair draped across his lap.

The Mizukage inclined his head to Kakashi, an almost innocent smile gracing his lips. "Come to join me, have you?" His smile grew. His eyes sparkled.

Behind his mask of indifference, Kakashi cringed.

But, Kakashi had no intention of responding. Professionally he glided forward quickly and efficiently.

The Mizukage held up one hand. "One more step and I'll kill the girl." He raised the knife in one hand. The man was a bastard. He knew how to manipulate others. Shinobi were not afraid to die and yet could not stand by and let anyone else die.

The Mizukage smiled, even more angelically. "We wouldn't want that to happen now would we?"

_That smile,_ Kakashi shivered, _how can he smile like that? Even pretend to smile like that? It creeps me out. Seriously. _

Luckily, Kakashi's sharingan, again, gave him an advantage. Another shinobi may believe, would want to believe, that the girl could live. They would be unable to kill the Mizukage if they believed her life was in danger. Kakashi could see that the girl was beyond saving, so without hesitation he threw his own kunai and the Mizukage threw his.

The kunai pierced the woman directly through the heart. A mercy stroke. To be dead so fast. And end to the pain. Kakashi was thankful.

But he did not have time for more. Instead of the heart stroke Kakashi had hoped for, his kunai had gone through the man's throat. If there was a skilled medical ninja, he may have even been saved. But Kakashi was not interested in saving the man sprawled on the bed.

In truth, Kakashi wished he had time to torture the man himself and inflict even half of the pain he had made the poor girl suffer. But he did not have time. He could feel the jutsu on the door behind his back weakening, as those on the other side fought to open it.

Kakashi withdrew a second kunai from his belt. Stalking forward he stood next to the bed. His hand flashed and the kunai buried itself deep inside the man's heart. An anti-climactic end for a man such as him.

Kakashi then allowed his sharingan to scan the room for exits.

=^.^=

He'd found that some of the dark curtains in the room covered windows. He had dispelled the traps and alarms with his dwindling chakra. He'd climbed down the roof outside the window, into the rain, and leapt to an adjacent roof. Again and again. But the guards outside the main building had seen him; two had attacked him and broken his arm before they died. But his skirmish had given him the opportunity to gain some ground on the other guards, but they weren't far behind.

The cool, cold, stone at his back drew him from his memories. The poster held the likeness of the woman he had seen in the Mizukage's chambers. A famous actress who had caught the attention of the wrong man.

He knew that the scroll was still in the pouch on his hip. His hand unconsously brushed past it for the hundredth time in the last day.

The Hokage had told him to use it only if he had no other choice. He knew that she wanted him back alive but that it was almost not worth the cost of giving him the scroll. He had seen her reluctance. And he would honor her decision. He would only use it if he had no other choice, none at all. Foreboding, slipped through him. The rain ran down his back.

_You're about to run out of choices. You'd better think of something quick._

The guards had rounded the corner of the alley. The other end was yet another wall.

He was cornered.

He could try to scale one of the walls and try to travel by roof to the edge of the city. Slick rain, a broken arm, and little to no chakra, did not allow him this luxury.

He was tired. Every muscle and bone in his body was moving only half as fast as it ought to. The guards seemed much faster, much stronger than the ones he had fought before, and yet he knew they were not. Five left.

Two of the ones who had entered the alley were out cold. Five more were here now. Even more were on their way. The rain created puddles, his feet splashed through the puddles as he moved into stance.

Three more.

One of them grabbed his good arm. Another leapt and snapped it.

He could feel the multiple breaks. His arm fell to his side. Both arms were useless.

He spun and kicked, his left foot landing solidly.

One more.

Twelve more.

Back up had arrived. More were coming. There would always be more. The rain fell into his eyes, obscured his vision.

He had no more chakra, no more will to fight. But they kept coming.

Ten more.

Twenty-four more.

Eighty more.

He forced his sharingan to stop counting.

He swiped a hand in front of his face.

He reached into his pocket and withdrew the scroll.

He would die if he didn't.

He was just hoping Tsunade didn't kill him for using it.

He used his sharingan to interpret the symbols inside the scroll.

He flashed through the hand signs.

Kakashi collapsed on a hardwood floor. The rain had stopped.

Another Author's Note: Let me know what you think!

AND everyone give a big thanks to my Beta: Rauchster!


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: Updating…. Yeah, I'll work on that. And everyone say thank you to my Beta: Rauchster. And of course, to all my wonderful reviewers: Kick-Aft, anon, Livvi18, KC, bruckleflesche, Okazaky, Ashpex, Ruon-jian, Drowzy, Manga Nin, and ActuallyNevis. I think that was everybody that reviewed. If I missed you yell at me and I'll put you in the next chapter. I'm probably not going to list that many again, like ever, spelling people's usernames is hard. Especially when you can't spell. But, if it's an amazing review or you've reviewed a bunch then I might mention you. I don't know, these things come on a whim when I start writing.

Here We GO!

Warning: Nothing much in this chapter but more crazy graphicness to come in later chapters.

Disclaimer: Guess what? I don't own Naruto. I know. Shocker.

Fair Trade

Chapter 5

Kakashi clawed his way up through the darkness. It pressed against him, choked him, filled his nose and mouth and made it hard for him to breath. Panting, gasping, he tried to get the desperately needed oxygen into his lungs. First he noticed the light. The bronzed, shinning, metallic light of light bulbs burned his eyes. Eyes that couldn't even focus, eyes that hadn't opened beyond narrowed slits, eyes that Kakashi closed almost as soon as he opened them.

Then his body screamed. His voice echoed the sound. His harsh cry echoed around the unseen room. Everything hurt. All his bones felt splintered and his insides felt shredded. He tried to focus. Kakashi tried to remember. Where was he? What had happened? But the pain was too much.

His already sore throat protested his cries. Writhing in agony, the silver haired man turned on his side as he coughed. Blood leaked from his slightly parted lips. He breathed, only thought about breathing. There was nothing else he could do. If he didn't focus on his breathing he knew he might stop. In, out, in again, out again. Air, oxygen.

The pain still coursed through him. He gritted his teeth and focused on his breathing. _Focus. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. In…_

He could not see beyond himself, hear beyond himself, think beyond himself. All Kakashi knew was that as he breathed the darkness inched closer. The darkness of his unconsciousness from which he had recently climbed. To be unconscious was to be vulnerable. But he didn't care. _In. Out. In. Out. Sleep. _He thought. _Just sleep._

And Kakashi slept.

=^.^=

"When he wakes up I'm gonna kill him."

"Ma'am, I understand your frustration, but that wouldn't be a good idea."

"Shizune, the man was seconds from dying when we got to him. I gave him the damn scroll to save his life. That scroll is worth my life and his and yours combined! What is the point of giving him the scroll if he doesn't even come back alive? Goddamn it. I'm gonna kick his ass, kill him, heal him and do it all over again!"

"Tsunade-sama, you have a—"

"Dammit Iruka! I don't care! Go talk to someone else!"

"But Tsunade-sama these are the medical reports you asked for. You told me yourself to deliver them." Iruka strode forward and tossed the file on the Hokage's desk. "Next time get them yourself."

The door slid shut behind him.

Shizune's eyes followed Iruka out the door and then flicked back to the Hokage. "Tsunade, ma'am, I really think you should—"

"The hell I should! Kakashi is in the hospital, Iruka's already gone and I have to clean up this whole Mizukage mess. Let's not even mention Kakashi's screaming be-better-off-dead torment. We had to seal off his room so that he didn't keep waking up the other patients. Damn."

The blonde let her head fall to rest on her desk. Shizune, reading the situation correctly didn't say a word. "Shizune, wake me in a week would you?"

Tsunade chuckled weakly at her own attempt at humor.

=^.^=

_Kakashi collapsed on a hardwood floor. The rain had stopped._

The man knew he lay on his bed in the hospital room. Flat on his back, the only sign that he was alive and breathing was the incessant beep of the heart monitor beside him.

_The candle sat on the nightstand next to a large four-poster, dark wood bed. The Mizukage sat resting against the headboard, turning a knife in his hands, what appeared to be the woman's hair draped across his lap. The Mizukage inclined his head to Kakashi, an almost innocent smile gracing his lips. "Come to join me, have you?" His smile grew. His eyes sparkled._

Kakashi's body twitched, his heart rate speeding, then slowing to normal again, head jerking restlessly on his pillow.

_Pain, intense shooting pain closed both Kakashi's eyes. His head felt split. The hand that had locked around his throat tightened and he gagged. His head swam. Pain. Lack of oxygen. So far, this wasn't going well. He blinked his watering eyes open._

Kakashi's eyes opened and air hissed through his raw throat and between his clenched teeth. Even with his eyes open, with his sharingan spinning wildly, he did not see the room around him. He groaned in pain.

_He was tired. Every muscle and bone in his body was moving only half as fast as it ought to. The guards seemed much faster, much stronger than the ones he had fought before, and yet he knew they were not. Five left._

Kakashi's eyes closed once more; his breathing ragged.

_One of them grabbed his good arm. Another leapt and snapped it._

His back arched off the bed, his mouth open in a silent scream.

_Pain lanced his lung. Kakashi unbent his body, straightened as much as was possible and drew in a breath through his nose. And another. He closed his eyes and softly let his head rest back on the cold surface. The incessant rain fell on his face helping the wall beneath him to calm him. Kakashi's pain induced headache began to fade. He was in need of a plan. Some plan. Any plan. Anything to get him out of here alive._

Unconsciously, Kakashi tried to push himself up off the bed. The chakra threaded straps kept him planted. Struggling, he twisted back and forth. Eyes scanned the room, his body shivered as if he were cold. He thrashed. And still, the tormented man could not get up from the hospital bed.

_One of them grabbed his good arm. Another leapt and snapped it._

Kakashi grunted, eyes closing.

_The Mizukage inclined his head to Kakashi, an almost innocent smile gracing his lips. "Come to join me, have you?" His smile grew. His eyes sparkled._

Kakashi screamed.

_The rain had stopped._

And kept screaming.

=^.^=

"DOES SOMEONE WANT TO TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" Tsunade threw the door open. "He's SUPPOSED to be getting BETTER NOT WORSE!"

"Hokage-sama, we don't know what—"

"Obviously, or it would be fixed already! Move!" She shoved the other medical-ninja out of her way and stepped up to Kakashi's bedside. The man was thrashing. Groaning.

His wounds, his bones were not healing. His chakra, his blood, his cells were not replenishing. The man was dying. Dying and no one knew why.

Sure Kakashi had been near deaths' door when they found him but that didn't explain why he wouldn't heal.

"I want every specialist from every medical field in here right now! Figure out what's wrong with him. NOW!" Everyone but Shizune scampered from the room.

"It'll be alright Tsunade. He'll be ok. We just have to figure out what's wrong with him. Someone is bound to know." The short haired woman laid a hand on Tsunade's shoulder in comfort. Comfort for the Hokage but also comfort for herself.

Tsunade nodded. But already her attention was on the man in front of her. In the newly gained quiet the blonde could finally concentrate. Sending chakra, both seeking and healing, from her hands into Kakashi she searched for the problem and again tried to heal his major wounds. She'd already healed him twice today and it was only three o'clock. He was getting worse. It had been four days since Kakashi had returned. Each day required more healing than the last.

"Why isn't his body healing itself? Why isn't his chakra replenishing? The man should be up by now!" Tsunade's questions were directed internally.

_Was there a drain on his power? There had to be, but with so many wounds it would be hard to find. Well, that's what twenty professionals are for. _Tsunade straightened. _A drain would continue to eat the man's chakra and keep him from healing. It solves the problem, but drains are so hard to pinpoint and we need it found soon. Even the specialist might not be enough. _Hazel eyes scanned the body in front of her.

Kakashi continued to pull against his bonds. His arms were chaffed as were his ankles, from his struggling. Constant movement wasn't helping him any, it was reopening his wounds. The doctors assigned to the man couldn't keep up.

Grabbing the chart next to the bed, Tsunade flipped through the pages, "90 milligrams of anti-hallucinogens, another 400 milligrams of morphine in…. an hour! Are they trying to kill him themselves?" She set the chart on the stand by the bed. "Shit!" She slammed her fist into the wall.

"Shizune, if those buffoons aren't here in the next 30 seconds you have my permission to fire every one of them." She opened the door. "I have a Hyuuga to go find."

=^.^=

Hiashi Hyuuga sat in his living room staring at the now cold cup of tea in front of him. If anyone asked him how long he had been sitting there, he wouldn't have been able to answer. But no one asked him. Somewhere above him in the house, a window was pushed open. The soft swish and clack broke the silence in the house. Light footsteps paced across the floor.

Hinata, Hiashi's daughter, was in her room. Just yesterday she had come back from a minor mission with Team 8. Neji had also just gotten home from a mission but he was filing the report and wouldn't be home for a little while longer.

The light footsteps moved across the house and echoes of the wooden walls as the girl descended the stairs. Moving to the kitchen, he could hear Hinata run water and light the stove. She proceeded to pull cups and tea leaves as well as a tray from the surrounding cupboards. When the water boiled, she carefully poured the tea.

Balancing the tray expertly, Hinata pushed the door open with her foot and slid it closed behind her. She padded across the living room to the table where Hiashi sat. Placing the tray by his left elbow she took his cup and replaced it with a new, steaming one. She put the cold one on the tray set the second hot one on the other side of the tray and sat down.

Hiashi nodded in acknowledgement and thanks. Picking up the warm cup, the stoic man sipped the tea then sat cradling it, rubbing his thumb across the ceramic.

Hinata sipped from her own cup then placed it back on the table.

The Hyuuga household was a somber place on a normal day but today the atmosphere was downright depressing.

The two sat in silence, Hinata slowly drinking her tea.

Both raven-haired heads turned as the gate to their property was thrown open. The presence in the court yard was not threatening but it wasn't one to take lightly. Both Hiashi and Hinata got to their feet.

Tsunade walked directly into the Hyuuga home uninvited. "Hiashi, you're here, good. Hinata, too. Even better."

"Hokage-sama," the strong male voice and quiet female voice chorused.

"Neji wouldn't happen to be here too, would he?"

Hinata gently shook her head while Hiashi said, "No, Tsunade-sama. Neji is turning in the report from his last mission, but he shouldn't be—"

"What about me?" Neji stepped past the threshold and began removing his shoes.

"I need all three of you to come with me."

=^.^=

"Twenty fully trained shinobi couldn't find anything in two hours. That's why I need your help. There has to be a drain on Kakashi somewhere, one he accepted, and I need you to find it as fast as possible. If it isn't found and broken soon, he will die."

"What is a drain?" Hinata asked.

"It's a chakra binding and its taking Kakashi's chakra. If it had been forced the disturbance would be noticeable, therefore he must have accepted it." Tsunade said, "Just look for anything unusual. It's going to be hard; the man has practically been torn to pieces."

Tsunade moved to the door while the three Hyuuga's settled themselves in the chairs placed around Kakashi's bed. The man was no longer writhing but every few minutes he would involuntarily shift in pain.

"Well, I'll leave you guys to it." The door clicked shut.

The three settled back in their respective chairs and closed their eyes.

"Byakugan!"

Another Author's Note: Sorry about the flashbacks. They were supposed to be somewhat confusing but hopefully you got what was going on. And I hope none of the characters are OOC but if they are I apologize. If it's something you think I can fix lemme know and I will do my best. Oh, and I tried to figure out the medicine stuff to make it sound reasonable, or slightly unreasonable but if I messed that up I'm sorry, I know nothing, I just used Google.


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: Hello Everyone! So, I've decided this takes place after all the wars and stuff, mostly just because I didn't plan well enough to actually incorporate the manga. I'll try to do that next time…. Maybe, if I feel like it. Oh, and yes, Iruka was in the office in the last chapter, and yes the scroll transports someone, and yes, it will all be explained, but not in the author's note. Or even in this chapter. I know I'm evil. I promise it will be worth the wait (I hope). Enjoy!

Warning: Nothin' much here…. This one's about a T maybe even less. Probably less.

Disclaimer: Nu-uh.

Fair Trade

Chapter 6

Sinking into the chair to the left of the hospital bed, Hiashi straightened his shoulders and with small, almost imperceptible movements, cracked his neck. A small amount of sweat had beaded on his forehead near his hairline.

It had been almost six hours since the three Hyuuga had started on the injured shinobi. At first they had all stood around the bed trying to pinpoint the drain on Kakashi. Yet after two hours of non-stop Byakugan use, all three had begun to tire. Neji had suggested that the other two take a break while he continued. This way they could rest while he worked and when it came time for him to rest one of them could take his place. After another half hour, Hinata had taken his place; after forty-five minutes, Hiashi took hers.

The adolescent boy now carefully scanned the body before him, extreme concentration written in every line of his body. Watching the boy, Hiashi suddenly felt his age. He wasn't old and he wasn't a slacker, far from it, and yet these two children outclassed him. Their ability to concentrate was surprising, they focused with an innocent intensity that Hiashi knew he no longer had. That same child-like spirit gave them determination, so much so that they focused not on themselves and their own weakness but on the strength the man before them needed to live. They fought with a stamina that was mental and emotional rather than physical. Hiashi could not say the same of himself.

Technically, both physically and mentally he was doing as well as the children but somehow he could sense that they knew Kakashi would not die. After watching so many die, the older man felt that death, though not yet certain in this case, was eminent; even with the tragedy the kids had experienced they held onto their youth. They believed Kakashi would live.

Sighing, Hinata leaned forward in her seat. It was about time for her to replace Neji, the seventh time, and still they had found nothing. The first hour or so, when the Hyuuga's had first arrived, the specialists from the hospital had been crowding the room. While they looked for their own answers to Kakashi's pain, they slowed the Hyuuga's by creating unnecessary noise and distractions. Tsunade had come back into the room and thrown them out. Hinata smiled lightly to herself. Tsunade's thunderous appearance and out-for-blood attitude had created quite the commotion in the small room. The blonde Hokage had terrified the poor doctor's, many of whom were still unused to working with the medic-Sanin. As the specialists scrambled to explain their failure, Tsunade's countenance had darkened, then she had simply opened the door and shoved men and women out alike.

Tsunade hadn't been back to the room since but the sun was setting and the work day was drawing to a close so dark-haired girl was expecting her. Hiashi and Hinata both turned to the Hokage, and after a few seconds Neji turned his gaze to her as well. The Byakugan veined eyes slid from his face, revealing smooth eyes and face. Hazel eyes met three pairs of off-white ones.

"Nothing, then?" the blonde hair swung from side to side as Tsunade shook her head. "I'll heal him again then leave you to it." Tsunade approached the bedside. Extending her hands, her eyes closed and green chakra melted from her palms into Kakashi's body.

Withdrawing her hands, the Hokage winced. Pain clouded her eyes and her face drew tight with worry. When her eyes met Hinata's the desperate plea was clear. And yet the blonde woman said nothing more, simply exited the room, closing the door softly behind her.

Neji looked at Hinata and she stood. Settling herself beside the silver haired jonin, Hinata swiftly closed her eyes, hands forming signs before her. Neji sat in Hinata's vacated seat.

"Byakugan!"

With a cursory glance over Kakashi's whole body, the quiet girl noted the changes within the man. As they had studied him, the man had deteriorated before their eyes, wounds becoming worse, chakra disappearing rapidly. She shivered. Deciding to begin at the injured man's right foot, she allowed her eyes to do the work for her. She had spent hours looking for anything, now she figured she'd use her brain where her eyes failed her.

_A drain is something unusual looking. Ok. It's obviously going to be taking chakra, so there should be a small disturbance somewhere. Ok. It's an accepted drain, meaning it will be along a chakra conduit not somewhere else. Ok. With all his wounds, Kakashi's chakra is being pulled to help heal at each site, there are so many disturbances. At least they are smaller than they were, after the healing each wound needs less chakra but that will only last so long, soon the—_

_ That's it! All the disturbances have decreased. All but ONE. The only one that should have stayed the same is the drain, it wouldn't, couldn't have been healed!_

"Otou-san, onii-san. I think I know how we can find the drain. The drain is the only chakra disturbance in Kakashi-san's body that will not have changed after Tsunade-sama's healing. If we look quickly enough we should be able to spot it before his wounds progress."

Both Neji and Hiashi stood quickly and moved to the bedside.

"Byakugan!"

=^.^=

The hurried footsteps reverberated in the pristine hallway. Each step echoing slightly against the tiled floors and white-washed walls. A door on the left side of the hall was thrown open without care. It slammed, ricocheted and stopped halfway closed. The brunette, who had attempted to enter behind the blonde, slid the door open so that she could enter, then she closed it softly behind her.

"Where is the drain?" Tsunade panted. "Thank Kami you found it or I'd have lost two irreplaceable ninja. Did you break it yet?"

"No, ma'am. The drain is still intact. We wished to leave that to you; we would not want any more harm to come to Hatake-san." Hiashi inclined his head. "If we are indeed finished here, I believe it would benefit us greatly to return to our home."

"Yes, yes. Of course," The blonde waved her hand dismissively, her eyes never leaving the man on the bed. "Thank you very much. Konoha thanks you. Please, return home, rest."

Neji, hand resting lightly on the arm of the injured man, watched both his uncle and cousin move towards the exit. Looking from Tsunade to the unconscious man, he slowly turned the unresponsive hand palm up. Tracing a finger down to the pointer finger, Neji indicated the small mark they had placed on the pad of the man's finger. Nodding at the Hokage's recognition, Neji followed his family from the room.

"Shizune, please find Morino-san for me, and tell him he is needed here urgently. Mitarashi-san as well if you don't mind. Quickly and quietly would be best." Silently, the dark haired woman left.

Tsunade moved around the bed until she stood by Kakashi's marked hand. Lifting it she studied the marked area both externally and internally. The chakra disturbance was noticeable, but could have been from a prick to the finger or a small cut. Tsunade attempted to heal the disturbance but to no avail. _It seems they have indeed identified the drain. And none too soon. I'm afraid he wouldn't have made it through tomorrow._

It wasn't that Tsunade didn't know how to dispel the seal or that she wasn't going to, it was rather that she didn't know how Kakashi would react, she didn't know what had happened to him and more importantly she didn't know what the scroll had done to him.

Ibiki knew about the scroll. Anko knew how to handle the effects of seals or the closely related drains. Tsunade sighed. Her shoulders slumped and the exhaustion of the last few days seeped into her muscles.

Stretching, rolling her neck from side to side, she awaited the arrival of the two jonin.

=^.^=

"So, Kakashi, as we had predicted your mission was exceedingly dangerous and still you managed to be successful." Tsunade stood at the healing man's bed side.

Meer hours after she and Anko had removed the drain, Kakashi had awoken and his wounds were well on their way to disappearing. The Hokage glanced at the report in her hands, "Ibiki's assessment is dry and clear cut. Very well. I will return tomorrow to finish healing your more serious wounds; you should be fit to leave the hospital by tomorrow or the day after. Welcome home Hatake-san."

The blonde stopped in the doorway, glancing over her shoulder at the silver haired man sitting propped up by starched white pillows. "I'm glad to have you back Kakashi." And she closed the door softly behind her.

Kakashi smiled lightly at the now closed door. But his thoughts wandered and his slight smile refused to remain. Kakashi remembered little to nothing about what had happened after he had opened the scroll. He remembered well enough, killing the Mizukage, fighting, the poor actress but by the time he had unraveled the scroll he hadn't been able to do more than glance at it before shoving his chakra laced fingers against the seal. He knew very well that he had transported. Obviously. He knew that something or someone had taken his place, that the seal on the scroll had disintegrated leaving no trace. He knew he had landed on a wooden floor somewhere in Konoha, which did little to narrow his arrival point. He knew that placing his blood on the seal of the scroll had created the drain that had almost killed him. He hadn't realized how much chakra the drain would require. He didn't know what the drain was for. He didn't know who or what had taken his place and he was becoming exceedingly curious.

Though still, currently exhausted, Kakashi's sharingan had been able to remember most of the seal within the scroll. The connecting pieces were still fuzzy, and unfortunately the devil is in the details, or in this case the answers were. One may even then assume that the devil is in the answers, but that may be pushing the cliché too far.

The silver haired jonin pulled a slip of paper and a pencil from between the sheets. The swirling letters of the seal were obvious but both small and rather large gaps kept the seven prongs from connecting. Cocking his head to the side, Kakashi studied the paper. The pencil danced across the page and another small piece of the puzzle fell into place. Kakashi narrowed his gray eye at the sketch. The sharingan eye was now hidden behind its traditional hitai-ate.

The man sighed down at the page then looked out the hospital window at the setting sun. The orange light tinted the edge of the sheets where the light fell through the window. The room around him felt darker though the lights within had not dimmed in the least. Kakashi was almost certain the seal had replaced him with another person. This information bothered him more than he wanted to admit.

=^.^=

The Hokage replaced her sake cup. It had already been emptied three or four times in as many hours. This wasn't binge drinking but it was more than she ought to have been drinking. Either way she knew it was time to finish up for the day, sign the last of the papers and go home.

Pulling the first page of the smaller than usual stack in front of her Tsunade read the first couple lines. The words were nonsensical. The words on the page read fine, but her mind refused to translate them; instead, Tsunade pondered Kakashi's mission. She couldn't help but worry.

Then, unexpectedly, her office door opened. The only person who ever bothered the Hokage this late at night was Shizune, if it had been important, there would have been running involved and the blonde had heard no thundering steps.

A young boy, not more than fifteen, entered the room. His eyes darted around the room, his apprehension quite obvious. Yet the Hokage was not the cause of the apprehension, nor was her office. Whatever was troubling the boy was something he knew, something that he had heard; something important enough that he was paying a visit to the Hokage.

The blonde sat forward in her desk chair, her paperwork well and truly forgotten. "What is it Konohamaru?"

=^.^=

_It is very disorienting to change suddenly from your normal everyday routine to horrifying danger. To be doing something normal and in one second need to protect yourself from eminent death. This is, however, the life of a ninja so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. And in many ways I'm not. I mean, I knew it would happen eventually, that wasn't a surprise. The actually change of scenery? Talk about a system shock._

Another Author's Note: Reviewers are AWESOME! Love ya! Any questions, comments, concerns. Let me know. And Rauchster of course .


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: I know, I know. Where's Iruka? It's a Kakashi/Iruka fic and so far there's only been one… maybe two scenes with Iruka. Well, he was in this chapter. And yes, I was planning on finally explaining things. But the chapter got away from me and he isn't. If you are confused, I apologize. Everything in italics is someone's thoughts (the last paragraph of the sixth chapter included), you get to guess who….. I may or may not reveal who within the chapter but I think you'll be able to guess. I've been doing better with the updating, ne? I will try to continue at this rate, but no promises.

Ps. This is unedited… my beta will edit it soon, but I just finished it and I'm a post happy person, so here it is!

Warning: Yep, headed back to mature but not in this chapter.

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, the Kage's would get better hats, no more lampshades!

Fair Trade

Chapter 7

_Practice doesn't make perfect. Wanna know why? In practice, there is always that thought in the back of your mind, the one that says: yep, this is practice, what could possibly go wrong? And as if to prove you right, nothing bad happens 95% of the time. The other 5% ends in barely more than minor wounds. I don't count actual fighting as practice. That's experience. Experience makes perfect. But that doesn't sound as good so I guess the people who decide catch-phrases went with: Practice makes perfect. Stupid if you ask me, but no one did. Oh, I know! Experience makes excellence! That's catchy. Let's see how many people catch on._

_ Wanna know why I'm bringing this up? Well, I thought I would be prepared for this. To be suddenly transported into danger, to fight my way out. I practiced and practiced. But, as I said, practice doesn't make perfect, it barely even prepares you for something like this. It is very disorienting to change suddenly from your normal everyday routine to horrifying danger. To be doing something normal and in one second need to protect yourself from eminent death. This is, however, the life of a ninja so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. And in many ways I'm not. I mean, I knew it would happen eventually, that wasn't a surprise. The actually change of scenery? Talk about a system shock._ _Don't get me wrong, if I hadn't practiced I'd be even worse off than I am now, but now I wish I'd had real experience. Real, easier experience. Think about it this way, say you've trained to be a genin maybe even a chuunin and on your very first assignment they throw you into an S-ranked mission. That's how I feel. And it does happen sometimes, I mean look at Naruto's first mission. But to be honest, he had it better than I do now. Kakashi was with him, and Sasuke and Sakura. I'm alone and that makes it even worse._

_ Alone._

_ It's amazing how fully encompassing and completely unfulfilling that word is. It both perfectly and incompletely describes the way you feel. There is this sense that to be alone you must physically be alone. It is, indeed, the definition. Yet when you feel alone it is not a matter of being alone in a room physically, it is a feeling of unquestionable loneliness. When everything you think, feel, is insignificant; your thoughts and feelings are locked inside your head, and they echo, echo. You have no peace from yourself. _

_ And then there are times when this loneliness flips, when it becomes a noise you can't escape, instead of an echo, echo. When so many voices are inside your head that you can barely get a word in edge wise. This is being alone. When you can't even feel important in your own subconsous._

_It can also flip this way: you can be alone and not feel alone, you can be content in silence and solidarity. But even then it is never enough._

_Nothing is ever enough to erase the feeling deep inside yourself that tells you that you are your only answer. If you want to get out of this you'd better do it yourself. You can try and blame it on others but it always comes back to your own inability, whether or not it was your fault to begin with. He's dead and it's my fault. I know, everyone knows, that I couldn't have been there, I couldn't have saved them if I had been there, and still, you like me, will blame yourself, ne? _

_When you cannot trust your own thoughts and feelings. So confused by everything else that you wish you could curl up and sleep forever. But I never do. I get up every morning, rain or shine. I wake up and face the day when it would be so much easier not to. I face my life because I do not want to hurt those I love. I wake up because I don't want to think about the consequences. It's a lonely existence._

_My inability to get on with my life stunts me. I am in constant uncertainty, instability. I cannot move forward and I stubbornly refuse to move back. At a standstill, my life is worthless. _

_I am worthless._

_And I am alone._

_Even worse, is that I do not mind. _

_It doesn't bother me as much as you might think it would. Sure, I wish that I would do something else with my life, but I am not dissatisfied. I am content enough. Weird, I know. To seem so sad, depressed and to be content in my depression and my ineffectiveness._

_But it is who I am._

_I don't strive to further myself, and yet I enjoy my work. Working is an outlet which serves as a distraction and as something to fill my time. I could have made more of my life. I have the capability to work harder, longer hours; I have the capability to have gone through more schooling to work less hours for more money. I could make a life for myself. But I don't. _

_I am my own worst enemy. And as my own worst enemy, I am content. Nothing else will ever annoy me, scare me, hurt me, and destroy me like I do. No other human being can scar me mentally, worse than I have. Quite the conundrum; or rather, a catch 22._

_And nevertheless, here I am, standing still, at a cross roads, closing my eyes and refusing to move on. I sit, and watch others move past me. Some move backwards through life, some, most move forwards, and the most special and determined of all, forge their own paths._

_Naruto did this. I have watched as he widened the path his life had taken, as he added to it, and finally as he stepped off his intended path and did what he felt was right. I watched his influence on those around him, how as his path widened many joined him, how when he stepped off the beaten path, others found courage to follow him._

_Some days I wish I were Naruto. Then I would feel my life meant something. But Naruto doesn't realize his own importance. He only knows that he wishes to protect those he loves, the village he loves, and so he becomes stronger to fulfill that wish. If I had Naruto's determination, I would hope to be as great as he is, but I am not Naruto, I am me._

_I do not have Naruto's dedication. I am much too lazy. I know, I said I work hard, and I do. I work hard enough. But I never give any one thing 120%; I take 100% of my energy and focus pieces of it towards everything so that everything gets done. I love what I do, but true passion is little but a fantasy, something from a romance novel, something for other people, not something for me._

_I place no value on my own life. Dying for someone else isn't a sacrifice, its work, it's expected. I am a shinobi. Shinobi as a whole are lonely. To die in the place of another would be expected of me, and yet I have never been in enough danger to justify my death. Until now._

_You know when you reach the point in your life where you have the option to fight or die? That's where I am. And yes, I took my time leading up to the question. So here I am and I don't know if I should die and get this over with or if I should fight. If I fight I may, probably will, die; if I don't fight, I will eventually die; and if I kill myself, at least it would be over quickly. Yet again, I cannot decide. It's my life, but because I feel it has no value, that I have no value, I don't know if I can fight for myself and as of yet I have been unable to pull my own plug, as it were. _

_Lying here, it is comfortable enough, as long as I pretend I'm somewhere else. And as long as I pretend no one else is in the room; and as long as I only focus about the fact that I'm laying down and not the amount of pain I feel, then yeah, it's comfortable enough. _

_Well, if I were going to choose I wouldn't be lying on hard metal, and there wouldn't be any barbed straps holding me to the surface. _

_On a happier note. I'm not hungry. I haven't eaten in… I'm not even sure how long but, viola, no hunger at all. Usually I'm always thinking about food. It's one of the few pleasures of life that I actually indulged in, well, that and books. Food, good food, great food, delicious food is the best thing for depression, the best thing for loneliness and the best cure for a broken heart; all of which I have experienced on multiple occasions. Eating so much isn't good for the waist line though. The amount of exercise must increase when my eating habits do… did. Anyway, even with my laziness I exercise, train; I am a ninja, if I wasn't in shape they'd probably fire me to get me out of their way. As I said, I work hard enough but not any harder than absolutely necessary. Sometimes I exercise to deal with stress, instead of eating, or in addition to eating, in an attempt to make me feel better about myself._

_Being strapped to this table is lonely, but it isn't the worst loneliness I've ever felt. Unrequited love is worse. Having acquaintances instead of friends is worse. Dead parents, no family is worse. Being a ninja is worse. _

_It doesn't scare me to think I will die. But I wish that someone was here with me. Not someone to talk to, or someone who will help me, but someone just for the connection, the human connection of lying next to a person and knowing that they are there with me._

_I'm sure there's no way for you to know I'm a virgin, I mean, I've done my fair share of messing around, kissing and petting…..heavy petting, but I haven't gone all the way. It's not that I was waiting for the 'perfect' person I just haven't. Now I wish I had just to so that I would have had the experience. Apparently it's amazing. Seeing as I haven't I couldn't tell you but it's practically all anyone ever thinks or talks about. It would be nice to have the memory to look back on, to make the here and now less lonely._

_When I was younger, about 18 or so, I made a list of crushes. Or maybe it was more just a list of people I would do. The list is still posted in my closet, to my extreme embarrassment. You'd be surprised who's ended up on it over the years. Ibiki is on there. Dear Kami, I have no idea how that happened, and I still haven't erased it. Anko is on there and Minato, and again, I'm not sure how, but Jiriaya is there. I'm guessing alcohol is related to many of the names but I don't remember so I can't be sure._

_No matter what though, I wish I'd gone out with someone on the list. Every time I went on a date it was because I was asked, not the other way around. I wish I had had the courage to ask someone, but I didn't._

_It's no use crying over spilt sake, so I suppose I'll just have to suck it up and deal. Still, I wish I weren't alone. Of all the times in my life to be alone, this would be the last place and time I would wish for it. If you are going to die, my advice to you would be to make sure you aren't alone. Even if it means someone that cares about you has to watch you die, even if it's someone you hate, or if the person is killing you. At least I have that. At least I have seen the face of the man that will kill me._

=^.^=

"Maa….. There's no need to have the boy escort me home, Hokage-sama. I'm perfectly fine. I promise. I'll go right home and rest, no getting lost on the road of life, and no alcohol. I'll be good, ne?" The silver-haired head tilted to the side.

"Konohamaru, make sure he does as he says he will. Don't leave him until the door to his apartment has shut behind him." The hazel eyes stared intently into the brown eyes that were now almost level with hers.

"Yes, ma'am…..ugh….. Hokage-sama." The boy turned to the disapproving gray eye, then back to Tsunade. He nodded his eyes down to keep from looking directly at Kakashi.

Outside the hospital, Kakashi stood, body relaxed hands in hidden pockets, finally redressed in his typical jonin outfit. Konohamaru stood next to him, almost at attention, his nerves clearly getting the best of him. He knew Kakashi, but not well enough.

"Maa….to my house then?" Konohamaru nodded and the two set off down the street.

Konohamaru saw Kakashi all the way to his door, and being the perfectly civil and polite man he is the jonin even shut the door before walking straight back out of his apartment the minute the landing was clear.

Flying rather slowly for him, Kakashi jumped from rooftop to rooftop towards the Hokage's office. Settling himself outside on a window ledge, out of sight, he listened intently to the conversation taking place inside. "And I'll need the three of you to split the shifts between yourselves….. No, no complaining. There are no other options. He's taken an indefinite leave of absence." Tsunade's sigh was audible. "If you can't cover something between yourselves, let me know so I can get someone else to cover it."

Hearing the latch to the door click, the silver-haired man leaned so that he could see around the corner of the window. He was just in time to glimpse the backs of three chuunin. Kotetsu, Genma and…. The other had been first out the door and he couldn't place the hair. The door shut behind them.

"So, Hokage-sama, whose gone missing? Care to tell me who took my place in that hell hole?" Kakashi sat in the windowsill; Tsunade turned to face him and sighed.

"And what exactly are you talking about, Kakashi?"

Kakashi held out a small piece of paper with a completed seal on it.

"Maa…Tsunade-san. No more games, ne?"

The blonde sighed.

Another Author's Note: Sorry again, Iruka will show up, I promise, and I know I didn't explain anything, I thought I would and the chapter seriously got away from me and went a completely different direction. It is sooo not my fault. Thanks for reading and reviewing.


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note: New chapter, not edited yet either. Rauchster died! (Not really) I'm impatient. Sorry, Rauchster, you may eat me alive later and tear apart my chapters. For everyone, ENJOY! Things are explained within! All that was once promised is (actually) therein contained. For reals this time.

Warning: Language…. Creepiness and things….getting there, probably mature.

Disclaimer: My last one was a spurt of genius…. I can't do that again…. Lampshades, haha….

Fair Trade

Chapter 8

"I'm not playing _games_, Kakashi. Sit down." Tsunade gestured to a seat in her office.

"When were you planning on telling me that another shinobi will die instead of me in the Land of Mist? Or were you just gonna play it off like nothing happened? Maa… Hokage-san, I have a right to know, ne?"

"You don't need to feel anymore guilty than you already do Kakashi. You blame yourself for much more than you ought to. This isn't your fault. He volunteered. I don't need you doing something stupid, or something reckless." Tsunade met Kakashi's eye. "I was going to tell you when you were fully healed."

"I'm well enough."

"I can see that."

Both shifted in their seats, neither relaxing much.

"Who?"

"Iruka."

=^.^=

_Waiting is hard. Shinobi move quickly. We are trained to react at lightning speeds and to be decisive. Patience is taught as well, but it is a matter of control. Interrogation teams have learned the best ways to break shinobi. Inflict just enough pain, scare them, and then leave them, alone to wait. Let terror eat them alive. Then they will be easier prey._

_ Lock a shinobi in a chakra reducing cell; break his arms, his legs. Take his hope. He can't heal, not well, no chakra, only his own determination will set his bones straight. He will have to do it himself. And leave him. No contact the first day. Water the second. Nothing for two days. Hallucinations._

_ Food and water on day five; food on day six; nothing; nothing; too much water; poisoned water; real water; nothing; nothing; nothing; food, no water; nothing; poisoned water; food, can't eat it; nothing; water. The water is poisoned and I don't care. Too thirsty. So thirsty. Hours of nothing but thirst. Ahhh. Water. Pain, but water, relief._

_ The hallucinations are the worst. Of people I know, knew. Seeing things I wanted to happen, of things that happened. And the nightmares, your fears haunting you while your awake. Worst of all though, the hope that comes with the hallucinations. Shinobi do not hope, but when your inhibitions disappear and all your training becomes obsolete, you hope. And all hope is crushed._

_ More water. So thirsty. Poison, don't drink, don't drink._

_ So thirsty; nothing, poison; nothing; nothing; poison; nothing; poison, I drink it. I don't know how many days it has been. The pain in my arms and legs is less. They are finally healing. Slowly healing. The poison isn't so bad now. It doesn't taste much. At first it felt like a snake in the pit of my stomach, curling and squeezing, burning venom. That faded, just a battery acid feeling, like swallowing liquid fire, and then it lessens. It doesn't taste or smell, which makes the shock worse when I drink it. I don't get water unless it's poisoned. The food comes more regularly now. Nothing wrong with the food, at least I can't tell if there is._

_ The hallucinations are gone, but the dreams are getting worse. I woke up screaming the other day. I can't even remember what the dream was about. My voice echoed around the room. I hadn't heard a voice, mine or someone else's in weeks. Days. I don't know. I've started talking to myself. I feel crazy. It makes me vulnerable, I know. But I can't stop myself. I'll do anything for that connection. I'm alive and I have to remind myself of that hourly._

_ More poison._

_ I've stopped healing._

_ The pain is back._

_ So are the hallucinations._

_ More poison._

_ "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"_

_ "NOOOOOO!"_

_ Poison. Hissing. Sounds. Poison. Crawling. Scrapping._

_ Out. Get out._

_ No._

_ Please. Please no._

_ Poison. _

_ Pain. _

_ SNAP!_

_ "AAAHHHHHH!"_

_ Arm's re-broken. Fell on it._

_ Cold cement feels good._

_ Just lay here. Don't move._

_ Hurts._

_ Ahh._

_ Voices outside. No leave me alone. Go away!_

_ Click._

_ Light._

_ Pain, eyes, too bright._

_ "You took away the man that killed my pet. Now you have two crimes to pay for. Come join me, won't you?" the man with dead eyes smiled._

=^.^=

A mocking sneer pulled his face tight. "Iruka? Really? So you thought the chuunin could make it out alive when I couldn't. Very encouraging, Tsunade- san." Kakashi laughed. "He must have had a death wish, and you're a bitch to fulfill it."

"Fuck this!" Kakashi stood, anger radiating from his normally relaxed posture. "The hell can a chuunin do? Go play god complex somewhere else Tsunade. And make sure to tell _Iruka_ thanks, if he lives. Maa…. You guys are something, ne?"

Anger drove him through the Hokage's building and into the street. He didn't look where he was going, very un-shinobi like of him. He leapt into a nearby tree and then onto the neighboring roof.

_Iruka, damnit. Take me for a fool. Why would they send Iruka? He's a teacher. A chuunin. Maa…. if they did send him he's not coming back. Fuck them! Send someone capable at least. I don't need a fucking dead teacher on my mind, or on my conscience. I need answers._

Landing outside the school yard in a tree, he surveyed the building. His thoughts were roiling. The school yard was empty, and yet dedicated teacher's lights remained on. As Kakashi sat, the lights in the building went out one by one. The total lack of artificial light within the building jerked the jounin from his thoughts. He saw two men walking from the building in darkness, not bothering to light their way. They spoke in quiet but un-hushed voices; their conversation light and carefree.

Yet Kakashi recognized the men, as he should, he had seen them in the missions report room enough times. Izumo and Kotetsu, ironically enough he had seen them not to long ago in Tsunade's office; now he had placed the third person. Genma, Kotetsu and _Izumo_.

Landing catlike behind the two men, Kakashi straightened and resumed his casual stance. Izumo and Kotetsu tensed and turned to Kakashi. Both looked mildly tense but not overtly hostile. _Interesting, _Kakashi thought. Keeping the expression on his face completely uninterested, he smiled at the two men. "Maa… you guys aren't doing anything tonight, are you? Come drinking with me. We have much to talk about, ne? And it's a Friday. No school tomorrow. Lucky me."

Izumo and Kotetsu, seeing they had no choice, followed the jounin into the city.

=^.^=

_"You've ruined my plans. Ruined," ruined, ruined, ruined….. "Can't even punish the silver haired ninja, because you took him away, tsk," not smart, already done this, "not smart, my friend. Now you have to pay twice for RUINING my plans." Ruin, ruin, ruin, ruined, devastated, destroyed, wiped out, wrecked, ruined; he felt ruined. He was ruined._

_ "Now, now. No tears, that's not at all shinobi-like of you." Tears, crying, wimp 'Ruka. Hahaha! "What is this? Bravery? How stupid." Crack, SNAP! Pain, pain, think of something else. "Silly man, why do you even bother to resist? I'm not going to kill you, you are much to pretty for that." Please, no, kill me, please, please, "Much, much to pretty and entertaining for that." Hahaha!_

_ Throb._

_ Don't think about it._

_ It'll go away. It has to._

_ Don't react; it'll make the sicko hard._

_ Throb._

_ Think about something else, somewhere else._

_ Konoha. _

_ The trees, and the birds, and the sunlight. "'Ruka! 'Ruka! Come on, silly!"_

_ "Wimpy 'Ruka. Don't worry about it. No one said you had to be the best. You're good enough 'Ruka, don't cry, come on, shh," 'Ruka, 'Ruka, baby boy, wimpy boy, good enough, not the best, don't worry, not the best, come on 'Ruka, baby boy. _

_ Not that._

_ Something else._

_ What else? _

_ Beyond complacency, what is there? I have not done what I would have wished to do._

_ I am, and yet I do not live. I exist and yet I leave nothing behind._

_ Teaching. My one chance to be anything, something more than Iruka. Anything more than Iruka._

_ "Iruka-sensei, your hitai-ate is missing. What—"_

_ "Naruto is borrowing it indefinitely. He's earned it."_

_ "Iruka-sensei, you are a good teacher."_

_ "Iruka-sensei,"_

_ "They are my students now, Iruka-sensei." Pain._

_ Throb._

_ Think of something else._

=^.^=

The bar was out of the way, it wasn't one of the typical shinobi haunts. Almost everyone, minus two or three people, was civilian. Kakashi didn't want to be overheard. And someone was bound to overhear; better it be someone who wouldn't understand, or someone who wouldn't know what to do with the information. It was more than loud enough to cover his questions, but still, just to be safe, shinobi are always safe.

Kakashi sat them at a table far enough from the bar to be private, yet close enough for it to be loud. A waitress sidled up, winked and flirted with each man in turn coaxing their drink orders from their lips. No food was ordered, and the girl walked to the bar to retrieve the drinks. Kotetsu and Izumo sat perfectly still on the same side of the table, Kakashi sat across, his stillness relaxed but just as absolute.

The waitress returned in short time, three glasses balanced on the tray, the sake bottle placed strategically between. Transferring all four objects to the table, making sure they held their pattern, she smiled, murmured a few pleasantries and moved to the next table.

Since Kotetsu and Izumo seemed to be avoiding making the first move, Kakashi reached across the table to take the mildly warm ceramic jar in hand. In turn, he poured the steaming sake into each of the three glasses. One sat before Kotetsu, one before Izumo, and Kakashi set the last down in front of himself. Though a bastard at times Kakashi refused to drink before his guest, however slightly unwilling they may be.

Kotetsu glanced at Izumo. After sharing a moment, both reached for their cups and relaxed into their seats. In well-hidden triumph, the jounin leaned forward, resting his elbows on the tabletop, the game was on.

"Maa…. I was just wondering where Iruka's gone."

Another exchanged glance, "No one knows for sure, Kakashi –sempai. He just transported out of class a week or so ago and hasn't been back. Tsunade apparently knows where he is but, hasn't bothered to share that piece of information." Kotetsu looked a little put out.

"Iruka must not want it known; she's not trying to keep secrets, ne, Izumo?" The silver haired man faced the brunet.

"I guess. He's our friend though. And it must have been personal business, Hokage-sama would have told us if it were a mission. I just don't know why Iruka couldn't tell us what was going on himself. I mean, that stunt he pulled last week, the one with you, Kami, scared those poor kids half to death, and then to disappear like that on them again so soon. What was he thinking?"

Kotetsu was watching Izumo, who in turn was watching his cooling cup of sake. Boisterous laughter two tables over broke him from his revelry. All three turned to look. The loud group was drunkenly hauling themselves to their feet, their leader already up and unsteadily pushing buttons on a karaoke machine in the corner.

When the attention at the table was again focused on the sake and the conversation, Kakashi urged, "The stunt with me, ne? What actually happened, I mean, really, too much of the road of life and you start to forget the details, right?" His head tilted to the side.

Kotetsu spoke, "Oh yeah, you'd been seriously injured on a mission. Here's what happened. So, in the middle of the safety lecture Iruka was giving, POOF, Kakashi face down on the floor, dead as far as anyone can tell. The kids got some of the neighboring teachers and we got you to the Hokage. No one had any idea where Iruka went, but next day, like nothing had happened, there he was. Course he was acting a little sick or something."

"Kami yes, like someone had sucked the life out of him, but he wasn't complaining," Izumo took over. "Kids were already upset about it, and the man kept getting worse, but wouldn't take a day off, nothing would convince him."

"Then," Kotetsu said, "couple of days ago, about the time you started getting better, POOF, he's gone again. No Kakashi in his place this time either. And he apparently wasn't coming back. And the kids, they don't know what to think. Hell, the other teachers don't know what to think."

"Iruka just up and left. I wonder what happened, he isn't like that at all, you know."

The noise from the karaoke group increased as their drunkenness did, but the silver haired man wasn't listening. Iruka had taken his place. The drain had been a clone Iruka.

Iruka was now a captive in the Land of Mist. He had taken Kakashi's place. Someone else was now bound to die for him.

And he had scoffed at Iruka's incompetence. He was a bastard and he knew it. Shit. Kakashi threw his fist violently down onto the table. The sake cups tipped and Kotetsu and Izumo looked up in surprise.

Damnit. Not again.

=^.^=

_Throb._

Another Author's Note: I'm sorry! I really dragged out the reveal of Iruka, not totally on purpose. I also apologize if anything is OC; criticism is fine but no fiery anger please. Iruka showed up, yes? Did you like him? I love Iruka! Please review and let me know what you think!

Love to all previous reviewers!


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: First, I'm gonna say, again, this has not been edited. Edited version will be coming forthwith via Rauchster. I have however edited it myself, so it shouldn't totally suck. Alright, on to more stuff. This story is supposed to take place after the manga right? Well, seeing as no one is sure where it's going, I'm going to deviate. I want to use a character that may die, or something, in the manga and I'm going to use him how I want (I'll try not to make him OC). He's not even in this chapter so it's like advance, advance warning. So, for anyone reading after the manga is finished, I'm just gonna say I wrote this when I'd read 500 chapters (I've actually read more than that but 500 is easy), so you can reference it. Ok, I hope that makes sense. Any questions let me know.

To clarify about the last chapter: Iruka was in Tsunade's office after Kakashi's return, it was a clone (Ch 6 ish). Iruka disappeared for reals when Kakashi used the scroll. The scroll had a drain in it which supplied the chakra for the clone of Iruka. Kakashi didn't know about the drain because it was part of the seal that was activated before he left Konoha by his blood (ch 1 ish). That is why the drain was on his hand.

And finally, this is a long ass author's note, so I'm going to end it with an ENJOY!

Warning: Seriously, it's gonna be hard core. It isn't yet, but next chapter. This one is severely creepy at parts.

Disclaimer: *Naruto shivers* I feel these creepy eyes on me, undressing me, changing the story line, AHHH! Kishimoto! Help me!

Fair Trade

Chapter 9

"Three fucking months, Tsunade-sama! He's dead! If they were keeping him alive, they would have sent a ransom."

Tsunade sat at her desk, face mask-like in her forced unconcern.

"I'm going after him, and you can approve it or you can't but either way I leave in an hour. I'm NOT going to do nothing; the man's dying on my goddamn fucking conscience after all!"

Tsunade pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Alright Kakashi. You may go. Reconnaissance only. If you find him you are forbidden from a search and rescue without back up. Understood? All your actions must pass through this desk, if he's alive, I will give you who you need to bring him back."

Hazel eyes met one slate gray one. "That is it, Hatake-san. You leave in an hour as you've requested."

Kakashi leapt through the open window of the Hokage's office. Three months of high tempers on both sides had frayed their cordial relationship. Iruka was too much an issue between the two. They blamed themselves and yet both believed they themselves were being blamed by the other. It made even forced friendship hard, strained.

Iruka's death weighed very heavily on both. Naruto was back and he wasn't the least bit happy that his beloved father figure was missing. And he didn't even know the half of it. After Naruto had talked to Konohamaru, he had burst into the Hokage's office; unfortunately, the silver haired man and the blonde had been in a "discussion" of their own. Neither was prepared to face Naruto's ire. Tsunade had immediately and visible deflated, in contrast Kakashi had gone from feigned relaxation to outright tension. They had placated the boy with small lies about rouge nin but who knew if the boy believed it or not. Naruto hadn't remained on best terms with either of them, though he was much more capable of acting as if nothing much were wrong between them. Of course, Naruto probably wouldn't blame either of them for Iruka's disappearance, or his death. He wouldn't have been happy that they had lied but the boy understood better than most how to forgive.

_To know a man better in death than in life. Obito, you wouldn't be happy with me now, would you? You wouldn't blame me though; you're just like Naruto that way. Sigh. Guilt, Obito. I can't outrun my guilt. I can't outsmart it. I can't leave it behind, and unfortunately I don't deserve to be rid of it. I keep messing up. I mocked the man who will now die for me. Fuck. I don't even know him, except that I didn't say a nice word to him while he was alive. I only spoke to him a few times, pleasantries and criticism. _

_ Shit. Obito, someday I hope to stand before you proudly. I just keep fucking things up. One day I'll do it right. I promise. _

The jonin rested his head against the stone before him. _I promise. I'll do it right or I will die trying._

Standing, hands in pockets, he stared at the names engraved into the stone. So many names. Some part of him wished to end up on the stone, and yet he knew he shouldn't. He had little self-love or pride, however much he feigned. Shinobi found they had no time for themselves, some self-confidence, and confidence in your own skills was necessary. But Kakashi had learned that shinobi, with what appeared to be the exception of those like Naruto and Obito, were a melancholy and depressing group. Shinobi learned quickly that they were disposable, whatever brave face they put on it, they would die. Shinobi are human. They don't want to die. And yet, if they don't die, you can't help but think maybe they haven't done their job right. Such a bleak existence.

Now, it was time to leave. Sighing, Kakashi headed towards the gates, slinging his pack across his back. The sun, which hadn't even reached his apex, was still soft and hadn't harshened with afternoon. The world felt warm but failed to burn, it was calm. The day was beginning, people were up and out. If the jonin's moods had dictated the weather it would be raining rather than shining. Yet, there was no cloud in the sky. No rain coming.

His mouth turned down, grimacing, the Land of Mist wouldn't be nearly this beautiful. So much rain. He rubbed his arm. He could still feel the breaks even though they were completely healed. Rain made him irritable, more so after his recent mission. Even the best don't come out of it un-scarred.

The shinobi at the gate waved him out. Once in the tree's he began leaping through them, quickly gaining speed. As much distance as possible as quickly as possible.

Shinobi should not hope. And yet they did. Kakashi hoped Iruka lived. Tsunade hoped Iruka lived. They both knew there was little to no hope. Still they held on. Nails and teeth bared. Naruto based his whole life on the hope he felt and he fought with that as his strength. Kakashi and Tsunade did not, and therefore, hope made them weaker instead of stronger. Shinobi are meant to die, are meant to have no hope, they should be robots but they aren't. Naruto's generation, a generation that fought with heart instead of duty, maybe they would do better. Live better lives.

=^.^=

Night was falling and he was close enough to the Land of Mist that the air was already dripping. That is to say it was raining. He need only travel to the Mizukage's island tomorrow. Then he could find traces of Iruka and hopefully follow the man from there. He had no set plans, but this was a reconnaissance mission after all. Get in, get the information, get out, then decide what to do next.

Setting up a small inconspicuous camp, the silver haired man settled down for the night. He closed his eye. A picture of Iruka's face was before him. Smiling, Iruka smiled a lot. The man was a source of comfort for the children, even in his anger. The man was a great teacher. What was he doing, dying in the Land of Mist in place of another shinobi?

Iruka was a constant in Konoha, he was sorely missed. Kakashi felt his conscience flinch. He couldn't, wouldn't forgive himself. Every minute longer, the man's chances when down. Iruka coming out of this alive was barely even hope at this point. If by some miracle, he was alive, the man wouldn't be the same, not for a long time, if ever again.

He would have been tortured, his body unrecognizable, and his mind, torn to tatters. The thoughts of a man, who has lived in relative comfort and away from most danger, even if he was a shinobi, would not be the same as the man who had lived through hell. Iruka would maybe never go back to teaching, unable to look at innocent children the way he had.

Iruka, known for his love of country and people may be unable to love anymore.

Maybe it was better if he were dead.

Dead men remained steadfast in the minds of people. They didn't destroy their own reputations and they didn't disillusion those who loved them. No, his father had been that way but, it didn't mean Iruka would be. The two men were completely different.

Kakashi hoped they were completely different.

He wasn't sure when, but he knew he was falling asleep. Mental images of his father, Iruka, Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, Tsunade, and Obito swam before his eyes. Others joined and danced in his subconscious. His memories and his guilt haunted him. He was left with no refuge from his own thoughts, not even in sleep could he escape.

Just as he normally slept, the jonin turned fitfully in his sleep. His training kept him more aware of the world around him, and it kept him from drifting too far into nightmares. When he had been in the hospital, the nightmares had overtaken him, drowned him. The medicinal coma had locked him in with his personal horrors; he'd been forever running from one moment of terror to the next. Shinobi did not live peaceful lives. This was truer for the infamous Copy Nin than it may have been for others.

Senses suddenly alert and awake, the jonin sat very still. He didn't know why he was awake, but he trusted his senses. He wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon.

More than a hundred yards off, directly to his right, moving from the coast inland, was a person. The sharingan whirred. Kakashi wasn't about to take chances. Not headed in his direction, the figure seemed to be clueless of his existence. In fact, whoever the person was, they had little to no chakra and they were most likely no one of importance.

Still.

Sharingan recovered, Kakashi took to the tree's, heading toward the man, hoping to spy on him from above. The man flinched, maybe he could sense Kakashi, thinking this, Kakashi tightened his hold on masking his chakra.

He man didn't stop moving slowly through the forest.

The closer the ex-ANBU came to the man, the easier it was to see that the man wasn't as ordinary as he first appeared. The slow gait was due to wounds, the severity of which was hidden to Kakashi without his sharingan. Whoever he was, the man was emaciated, his clothes and body soiled and filthy. Life had not treated the man well.

The darkness hid anymore information from the jonin. Pure curiosity led him to again use his sharingan. What he saw stole his breath.

Practically falling from the tree, the silver haired man landed before this emaciated stranger. Kakashi stared. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.

Neither, it seemed, could the man before him.

"'Kashi?" slack jawed surprise lined the broken and misshapen face of Umino Iruka.

Before saying another word, Kakashi used the sharingan to beyond-any-doubt confirm that the man before him was Iruka. It was.

"How are you—NOOOOO! Get away from me! Fuck you! I'd almost made it! Damnit all!" Tears stained Iruka's cheeks. "I haven't even left have I? Of course not. This is some new dream. Shit."

"I don't wanna go back! Please, please, please don't make me go back. I'll do anything. I'll do anything. Who are you? Why are you here?"

Iruka's head turned to the side, "Kashi? No, not Hatake-san, Hatake-san isn't…. no, no, no!"

Kakashi was speechless.

Iruka met Kakashi's eyes. His chocolate brown eyes darkened to black in uncontrollable rage. "YOU! HOW DARE YOU! FUCK YOU! I'M NOT YOUR PLAYTHING YOU SICK GODFORSAKEN FUCK!"

Iruka lunged at Kakashi who instinctively sidestepped. The wounded man fell, his balance heavily impaired. Unthinkingly, the silver haired man reached out to help the fallen brunet to his feet.

The outreached hand was slapped away. "Don't touch me. Don't you DARE touch me! I'm not dead yet, fuckers! HAHAHA! What! You think you can do something else to me! Haven't talked yet, don't know much anyway. So what?" The tears started again.

Iruka jerkily pulled himself to his knees. He swayed gently as if his body were only moments from collapse. He was only moments from collapse. The dark head lifted and now muddy, confused brown eyes met Kakashi's mismatched ones. The eyes pleaded with him.

"I'll do anything, ok?" the tears continued to fall. "Please, please don't make it hurt…. I won't fight, promise. Ok? Please?" Shaking hands reached for Kakashi, found his hips, tugged at the lacings.

The standing man couldn't comprehend this. He stepped back quickly. Iruka, still gripping Kakashi's waist band, tipped forward. His whole body landing for a second time in the mud of the forest floor.

Unable to move more, Iruka's head tilted up, towards Kakashi. "Please, kill me."

His head fell forward to the ground.

Another Author's Note: Thank you reviewers! I done good, huh? I'm getting chapters out quickly. Well, I'm really enjoying my own story. TeeHee! So, I hope everyone liked it and I'm giving you advanced notice, next chapter will be worse than chapter 4. Seriously. It's going to be horribly graphic and all kinds of gross and creepy. I know the end of this chapter is freaky, but I like it! Hey, I'm weird that way, and I did write it. Questions? Comments? Review! THANKS! Love you all!


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note: I hope you liked the last chapter, I know I did! This chapter isn't going to be happy (like any of this story has been happy); yes, I'm warning you before the warning. I'm serious, read the warning and take it seriously. Remember chapter 4, it's going to be like that, but probably even worse. This chapter isn't edited, again, but it will be soon. Promise! (The last couple chapters have been edited, I just forgot to change the authors note )

Warning: Beware non-consensual sex and drug use, torture and over all mind fucking. Not trying to spoil, but it's going to be bad guys. Ps. this is kinda a warning for a few chapters… it's all going to be the same kind of stuff.

Disclaimer: Naruto is not this graphic; it's a happy story most of the time.

Fair Trade

Chapter 10

Rain.

Kakashi had really come to hate it. When it fell it was endless. While it fell it was disarming. After it fell it was gloomy. Before it fell it was ominous. During the rain, the world refused to be happy. The rain paused happiness inside cozy houses and around warm fires. Where the rain touched, the land cooled. When there was rain people stopped living, they decided instead to sit. Waiting out the rain. The thunder and the lightning, the forces of unseen gods, fighting unknown battles in an unidentifiable realm, rain disturbed the peace.

Humans, in an attempt to delude themselves and rewrite undeniable history have symbolized it. Rain is growth. Rain is renewal. Rain is life.

Rain is none of these things.

Water is growth; renewal; life.

Rain is the sadness of the world imposing on the lives of those who share her home. Watching rain is watching the world cry. Rain is misery. Rain is uncertainty in physical form.

Matted hair half covered Iruka's emaciated face. His checks were sunken, his skin pale, a combination of malnourishment, torment and the rain. The soft muddy ground coated what little of him had been clean. Slowly the weight of his body pushed him into the earth, with time maybe the man would disappear entirely.

The jonin was unsure of what to do next. To say the former Academe teacher had shocked him would have been an understatement. The famous Copy-nin was frozen to the spot, even his infallible training unable to coax him into response.

Poor man.

Wounded man.

Devastating.

The barely recognizable brunet head had hit the ground for a second time, now he didn't try to raise his head, he simply lay still. Iruka's legs sprawled, one arm bent at an awkward angle, one arm tucked beneath his torso. The sharingan eye saw that the defeated man's eyes were open. That same eye revealed to Kakashi that Iruka was no longer seeing the world around him. The man stared blankly, unblinkingly, his mind very far away.

Reaching for the limp arm beside the body of the man, Kakashi half expected another outburst, but there was none. Iruka didn't so much as flinch, blink or give any indication he knew what happened to him.

Mud splattered the silver haired man as he hoisted the brunet off the ground and threw him across his own back. Iruka ought to have weighed more, but understandably he didn't. Kakashi was only just beginning to catch glimpses of the hell in which Iruka had lived.

Maybe later he would understand; maybe later he could talk to Iruka. But first things first, both men needed out of the rain, both needed dry clothes and both needed to be back in the Fire country sooner rather than later. Kakashi didn't want ninja coming after him or Iruka. So, the man took to the trees, his counterpart balanced securely on his shoulders.

The sun was beginning to rise, the tip cresting the horizon and flooding the forest's clearings with light. Stopping in one such clearing Kakashi laid the brunet against a tree. If he hadn't known better he may have thought Iruka was only sleeping.

No, not even then. The man looked haunted, even in exhausted sleep. The clearing where they had stopped was only feet from the bank of a small stream. Undressing both himself and the doll like body of the once vibrant teacher, Kakashi threw Iruka's arm over his shoulders and dragged the man to the edge of the water.

The cold water shocked a response from the teacher, his eyes cleared and he washed the dirt from his body habitually without even glancing at the silver haired man or his surroundings. Then, with the same abruptness the light in the man's eyes flickered out and Iruka collapsed, sinking to the rocky shore. His body was once again as lifeless as his eyes.

Without saying a word, the jonin washed both their clothes after once again propping Iruka against a tree.

Kakashi pretended to not notice the old and new bruises, the fresh and scabbing cuts and the very visible ribs. Poor man. Still he kept his mouth closed. Dressed in his own newly clean and wet clothes Kakashi mover from the bank to the grassy clearing where the brunet waited. He redressed Iruka in his no-longer-so-filthy clothing, knowing that the sunlight would dry him out soon enough.

The teacher hadn't moved even an inch, which wasn't unexpected, the man just continued to stare blankly. Sighing Kakashi dropped to his haunches before the teacher.

Their faces were only a few inches apart; Iruka flinched at the sudden proximity, the clarity flaring and again dying in his eyes. A gloved hand patted the brunet head and but he received no flinch, nothing. Shaking his head Kakashi moved away. After a few minutes spent stretching and resting he walked back to the sitting man.

Iruka's eyes met Kakashi's and what appeared to be sanity returned.

"Kakashi," Iruka raised his hand to Kakashi's face, "it's nice to see you again. You aren't wounded are you? They do so love their punishments." The hand played gently with his mask but made no effort to remove it so Kakashi made no effort to stop him. "How'd we get here? This is another one of their tricks, I know it." Iruka leaned in conspiratorially, "You'd think that they'd stop trying, we've got them all figured out now." Strangely enough, the man was smirking

Kakashi again felt thoroughly perplexed. A gentle smile now graced Iruka's chapped and bleeding lips. "So handsome. When it's you I don't mind so much, you know? It's better than—"Iruka suddenly flipped the jonin's hitai-ate off his face.

Kakashi swiftly moved away, senses moving quickly to high alert despite being in Fire country and being completely alone with Iruka. His sharingan whirred to life and studied the chuunin. The man surprised him again.

Where seconds before, the brunet had been cute and accommodating, now he was adversely hard and watchful. The suspicion rolled off the small frame. A mocking grin spread across his face, "So original. Third times the charm, right?" He chuckled. "It hasn't worked has it? I was sent for a reason, yes?" He muttered to himself, "Looks real, but the fake has one. Trick, trick trick…" He trailed off. Eyes downcast.

His eyes flicked up, "I'm not gonna crack. Kill me or let me go." Iruka sighed, "Not that you will. How long this time?" Time, time, time, time. "Time, time, time. So much time. Never enough time."

Watching this, the jonin could tell only that the man wasn't understanding the present, that whatever had happened to Iruka had affected him mentally more than physically. His uncertainty and indecision stayed his actions.

"Thirsty. So thirsty." Silly 'Ruka. "Always thirsty." Iruka's eyes had lost focus, and then they latched on to Kakashi once more. "You have water for me, don't you? They always send water with you. That's why I like you better than the others."

His brow creased, eyes again turning inward, "All the same, all of them, dead, gone, captured, fake. Not real. All of them, the same….. Thirsty." Pleading eyes looked at Kakashi. "You have water for me right? I need water. Please," he begged. "I NEED water. It's so hot. Isn't it hot?"

Iruka's eyes scanned the clearing, the grass, the flowers, the trees, and he asked again, "Water?"

Ever so slowly Kakashi pointed, "There's a stream there, and the water is clean enough." Moving like a drunk, Iruka lunged through the trees, the jonin followed. Seeing the man's desperation, Kakashi wanted nothing more than to ease his suffering. Maybe the water would return some sanity.

"Water, water, water, water," the litany, however short, became a sing song ditty. Iruka swayed as he said the word again and again. "Water, water…" Without pause Iruka walked straight in. When the water reached mid-calf he knelt and brought his water filled cupped hands to his mouth.

The Copy-nin stood by watching. Without knowing what had happened he couldn't help, he wanted to help; he just didn't know what to do. What do you do with a lunatic, with a man whose mind was addled by torture?

A mouthful of water sprayed across the rocks. Iruka looked irate, "That isn't water. Its poison. I'm not going to drink poison. Why? I thought you liked me?" he yelled, turning on Kakashi with clenched fists and filled eyes. Tears streamed down his face. "I thought we were friends! I HATE YOU!"

Another abrupt change in personality. "Fuck! So thirsty." He paced irritably beside the stream. "They would use you to poison me again. They love their mind games don't they? Well fuck you all! Leave and take that shit with you!" Iruka waved Kakashi away dismissively. The pacing continued, speeding up with each turn. The man was frantic.

"Iruka," the silver haired man attempted to get the other man's attention. "Iruka? Iruka! IRUKA!" The brunet turned at the loud voice. "The water isn't poisoned, drink some."

The passably clean haired head shook back and forth in denial. "Poisoned. But I'm so thirsty. So thirsty." The chuunin's eyes clouded, closed.

Opening his eyes Iruka blinked up at Kakashi, "I like you. You bring me water. Do you have some? I'm so very thirsty. I just… just… need water. That water," he gestured to the stream, "is bad. Don't drink it. Please, please, please!"

Iruka fell to his knees before the once-too-many-times stunned Kakashi. "I'm so thirsty! I'll do anything if you give me water. You have water, right? You have to have water." A quick hand shot out and grabbed Kakashi by the pants for the second time in the last twenty-four hours.

Iruka made quick work of the snap at the front of his pants. Finally returning to reality, Kakashi jerked himself out of Iruka's grasp. Iruka almost stumbled and fell face first again, but he caught himself and then righted himself.

Quickly re-doing his pants Kakashi, sharingan eye still uncovered, stared intently at Iruka for the hundredth time. Nothing was noticeably different and yet, the man was no longer the man Kakashi had once met. What had happened to him? If nothing else Kakashi knew that the best bet would be to get him to Tsunade.

After bribing Iruka in any way he could to drink the water he was so desperate for and failing, Kakashi finally knocked out the hysterical chuunin, putting his guilt and worry to the side; he began the last leg of his hike home, chuunin firmly in place.

=^.^=

Apparently taking Iruka to Tsunade had been a bad idea, if the yelling, hysterics and breaking ceramic weren't a clue. Kakashi had taken him directly to the hospital where the wounded man had been assigned his own room. Tsunade had been contacted post haste and had arrived almost immediately.

The brunet had roused only moments before Tsunade had entered, mid-plea for water the door had slid open. Iruka screamed. His injured body flung itself sideways away from the Hokage. His flailing arm hit and knocked a potted plant; it crashed to the floor.

The room continued to echo with Iruka's cries. He scrambled across the floor and curled up in a corner, his hands covered his ears, his eyes swinging erratically from side to side, mouth still open and screaming.

Kakashi, seemed the most unfazed by Iruka's odd behavior, Tsunade, though shocked, had the sense to reach into her pocket and pull out a syringe with what Kakashi believed was a tranquilizer. The few other medical-nins in the room were shocked beyond words, completely out of their element.

When the syringe cleared Tsunade's sleeve and came into full view, Iruka's gaze froze on the object. Unblinkingly, he stared. But his screaming stopped. To the surprise of everyone else in the room, the wounded man crawled towards the blonde. The woman he'd been terrified of moments before, now seemed to be a source of hope. The chocolate eyes never left the syringe as he continued forward.

Reaching Tsunade, the deranged man sat up on his haunches, like a begging dog. "You'll give it to me right? I-I need it, please? Thirsty. So thirsty. I won't complain or run away or struggle, I'll be good. Then, then I get some right? And water, then water." The chocolate ones looked imploringly into the hazel ones.

Indecision clouded the blonde's mind, now she wasn't so sure she should sedate him. Something was very wrong and she didn't need to make it any worse.

At her silence, Iruka began to panic, thinking he wouldn't get it. "Need it. NEED it. I'll-i- I will. Ok. Just gotta do it for a little. Its fine, fine, fine." Body rocking slightly, Iruka began undressing, his clothes sliding quickly and familiarly from his skeletal frame.

A medical-nin reached out to help Iruka, trying to re-dress the man, he felt horrible for him, and the man was obviously deranged. Let the man keep some decency at least, retain some pride.

But, Iruka screamed at the man, swung his arm forcefully towards the intruder's face. Pure animalistic rage drew the chuunin's face tight and a low growl escaped through clenched teeth and drawn lips. "Mine! I need it, need it. Go 'way. Leave me. Mine."

The rest of the torn clothing fell to the floor making a puddle around the kneeling man's legs. Kakashi watched as the world narrowed to Iruka's actions and Tsunade's response.

Now completely naked, Iruka's hands slid down his chest. The room became unbearably still. No one breathed. The questing hands continued down until they circled their own member. Cupping himself, Iruka began stroking, slowly, within his hands the flaccid piece grew and hardened.

Again chocolate eyes searched hazel ones. Tsunade couldn't move, didn't know what was going on. The eyes before her begged for the syringe, glancing again and again with increasing urgency toward the full tube. As the panic built inside the man, his strokes became faster, up and down, along the now fully hardened penis.

"Please, please, please," tears once again ran down the cinnamon skin, eyes swimming, he leaned towards the Hokage, "Please, please, please."

The man was desperate.

Her own eyes brimming, Tsunade placed the needle point to Iruka's forearm. Poor tormented man. All Iruka's movement stopped, he held his breathe.

Slowly the liquid entered his blood stream. His eyes fluttered in ecstasy, and then his other hand resumed its motion.

Just as the sedative dragged Iruka under, he came.

Iruka fell forward, unconscious, into his own cum.

Kakashi flinched.

A single tear slid down Tsunade's pale face.

Another Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed! I sure did (of course)! So I have some special thanks, to Rauchster for being an amazing beta. To ActuallyNevis and Dattebayo1013, for being the funniest, bestest people to talk to and bounce ideas off of. Oh, and I have a new story, a really short one-shot, Sasuke's Heartache. If you read it i will love you, if you review, I'll marry you ;) Same goes for this story, pretty please review!


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note: *bows down in apology* this chapter is a long time coming. I know. I'm a terrible author. In my defense I was not slacking, I just wasn't writing. But it doesn't excuse so much time. I very much hope this chapter is worth the wait. It is at this moment unedited, even by me; I just wrote and posted to get it to you guys as fast as possible. If you notice mistakes or if anything is confusing let me know so I can fix it. Now, please enjoy!

Warning: This chapter contains creepy…. And non-con implications and like…. This story is M for a reason.

Disclaimer: Disclaimed.

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Chapter 11

Kakashi could faintly hear Tsunade talking outside the room. For some reason he had been unable to leave Iruka's side. He knew the attachment came from misplaced guilt. He knew that, but he couldn't get himself to leave. So he continued to sit next to Iruka. Poor man. Kakashi knew he would have been more suited to the torture. Chuunin teachers were not equipped for missions like that. For being tortured. The mission had been S-ranked mission. No chuunin would ever take one.

The Hokage spoke with a nurse, dictating the basic care that the teacher would need for the time being. Kakashi could hear the sound of the woman's heels as she walked away. Heavier steps approached from the other direction. Tsunade sighed.

"Ibiki."

"Hokage-sama."

"Did you find men who were willing?"

"Of course. But we will probably have to split it between at least three people."

The jonin still in the room heard the shift in weight and the two people moved through the open door.

Tsunade pushed back the curtains around the chuunin's bed, Ibiki's face visible just over her shoulder. "Kakashi, why are you here?"

Blinking at both older shinobi, the silver haired man carefully thought through is words before he spoke. "Lost on the road to life is all. Figured I'd come say hi."

Everyone in the room knew he was lying.

"If you, perhaps, need someone to store Iruka's memories, I might be of assistance." Kakashi was more than capable of mentally handling torture; he had himself multiple times, both by proxy and by reality. By proxy is much easier to handle. Not that there weren't side effects but it was not as vivid as the real thing. It didn't wound you like the real thing.

Ibiki was going to reach into Iruka's head, pull out his memories of the last month or so and transfer then into another mind to be analyzed. With someone as unstable as Iruka it was necessary. Clearly, Iruka could not give the information. Only in the worst cases was brought Ibiki requested. Iruka was much loved in Konoha. Therefore, much would be sacrificed for the man. Men would willingly accept torture to help him.

Ibiki studied Kakashi, and Tsunade studied Ibiki. Apparently if Ibiki said he could, Kakashi would be the one to whom he transferred the memories.

"Fine. But only a portion at a time. I don't need two useless shinobi on my hands."

Nodding ever so slightly Ibiki moved to the head of Iruka's bed. He laid a hand on the chuunin's forehead. Reaching the other had across to Kakashi, deft fingers pushed the hitai-ate up and out of the way. Ibiki's fingers met Kakashi's forehead.

Mismatched eyes flickered closed. The tug of memories pulled at his mind. Slowly, the jounin slid his own thoughts into the first memory. Another person's memories felt like a dream, realistic and yet not real. It wasn't that it hadn't happened, it had; but it these memories weren't Kakashi's, therefore they were not his reality. It was Iruka's.

The memory was disjointed, like memories tend to be, like dreams tend to be. It made sense as a whole but details and nuances of real life were hazy.

Through Iruka's eyes, Kakashi saw Tsunade enter the prison like room. He saw the long needle and the syringe she held. The pinch in his arm was muted but persistent, the euphoria that slid through his veins moments later felt all too real. The lightheadedness, the unreasonable thrill, and suddenly, the jounin was living in the moment, living in the memory, not just watching.

The light pain that had been nagging at the teacher's ravished body faded as the pain killers soaked in. the lethargy and contentment tugged at Iruka's tan lips. Tsunade smirked back. And to his mortification Iruka, and subsequently Kakashi, felt a rush of heat flow to his groin. An abnormal amount of heat, their minds noticed. Not typical arousal, but rather an all-consuming drug induced hard on that would take a serious toll on his body.

Strapped to the table, Kakashi, Iruka, couldn't move. The heat threaded through his hips, into his legs and his abdomen and moved higher. Body straining, arching his back, thrusting his hips, Kakashi sought something, a release of some kind. Anything.

Tsunade complied. The blonde reached straight for his straining dick, an easy task seeing as he wasn't clothed. Without lubricant, she roughly stroked her hand up and down his length. Unconsciously, his hips moved with her, found the rhythm of her hand and followed. Strangely, as the speed increases, his body slowed until he could no longer move. At all.

A potent mix of drugs, pain killer, aphrodisiac and a nerve inhibitor; get him high and happy, get him hot and hard, make him bothered, incapable and immovable. It wasn't until twenty minutes later that Iruka realized his raging hard on wouldn't deflate nor would he be able to come, until the last and most torturous of the drugs was out of his system.

Kakashi mentally jerked as he felt the memories swirl around him. He saw repeat scenarios; Tsunade had come to Iruka's prison cell many times. Every time she brought the same almost lethal dose of medications.

The memories settled and Iruka, Kakashi, focused on the naked bouncing blonde atop him. Eyes closed in ecstasy she moved off of his prone form. A click at the door drew their attention. Sakura entered. Memories flickered, this too had happened multiple times. The pink haired girl also carried a syringe, much smaller than the one the blonde had brought. Tsunade nodded to the girl and the smaller woman approached the bed almost shyly.

The jab of the needle was nothing, but the hot liquid that seared his veins would have left him thrashing and screaming if he'd been able. Pain, pleasure, arousal and all the while incapacitated, torture, more literally conditioning, the synonymy of pain and pleasure coupled with complete submission. A dose of involuntary masochistic training.

Kakashi's real body jerked and Tsunade quickly checked his health signs. Slightly elevated breathing and heart rate, nothing unusual: receiving the nod the scarred man returned his concentration to the two unconscious men.

The moment the pain faded, hours and hours and hours later, his still erect penis was finally allowed to rest. Coming silently Iruka sighed and Kakashi drifted into a fitful sleep.

Kakashi could not hear or think what Iruka thought in these memories, but he could feel Iruka's emotions, the gist of emotions at least. The silver haired man slipped from the relief tinged first memory and melded his consciousness into the second disgust filled one.

The immediate horror that met his eyes slammed him directly into the physicality of this new memory. Tied spread eagle on the same table in the same room as before, chocolate brown eyes stared at the face of Orochimaru.

The cat-like eyes stared back gleefully, the mouth gaping, smiling. And the infamous snake tongue, the _tongue_, was hanging down, disappearing from view.

The raven head was settled between cinnamon thighs, a cock, his cock, was looped by multiple metal rings and the soon-to-be-familiar feeling of aphrodisiac had his length standing at attention. Shivering in revulsion and fear, Kakashi, Iruka focused again on the purple tongue extending from the evil man's mouth.

Kakashi could feel the mess of negative and disgusted feelings roiling in Iruka and the strength of these feelings made him hesitate before taking check of Iruka's body.

Starting at the head and moving down, he felt the pale hand in his loose hair and saw the distorted arm beside him. Noticing his perusal, Orochimaru smirked wider.

Yank.

The movement brought awareness to his body.

"You have soft hair, you know?" Yank.

That tongue. It was, it was….INSIDE HIM….. H-how…FAR?

"Truly it is so luxurious and thick." His stomach felt full, stretched.

He felt a nudge at the base of his throat.

Yank. "Pretty pretty hair."

His mouth opened in voluntarily and the scream rising in his throat was cut off.

Iruka, Kakashi, locked eyes with Orochimaru and at that same moment Kakashi felt a light lick across his upper lip. Orochimaru hadn't moved except to grin around his protruding tongue.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Yank.

Iruka screamed.

Kakashi screamed.

Memories flooded their minds. Flashed through Kakashi's mind as Iruka relived every moment.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Tsunade, naked and smiling softly, in the cell.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Sakura was smiling her child-like smile and snuggling up to him, in the cell.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Cold eyes, dark black eyes, red eyes, sharingan eyes, drilled him from the door; Sasuke was slowly removing his clothing.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Itachi moved to the door replacing his…..in the cell.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Madara glowered, then smiled, and finally left with one last parting kunai through Iruka's arm. Iruka was still locked in the cell.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Kotetsu and Izumo together laid hands on his arms, in a hospital bed in Konoha.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Naruto with fox eyes, his fire-temperature skin burning Iruka. The smell of burning filling the cell as Naruto moved, thrusting above Kakashi, Iruka.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." The blonde Akatsuki stroked his head; the two dark haired ones in the back looked on stoically, in the prison cell.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Genma laughed and ruffled his hair, spilling it into his eyes. They were just passing in the Leaf village school.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin." Orochimaru.

FLASH.

"You have beautiful hair, chuunin."

Kakashi was staring at himself. Staring at a naked version of himself. A version of himself which had just told Iruka (Kakashi in spirit) that he had beautiful hair. Why? They were clearly still in the cell. Iruka's body was still strapped to the table. The Kakashi he was seeing was a damn good imitation.

The imitation Kakashi reached one had under Iruka and wrapped his other fist around the chuunin's growing erection. No drugs this time.

The chuunin squirmed, but in pleasure.

"You'll be a good boy, right?"

Kakashi felt the stretch of Iruka's lower body as the imitation Kakashi rocked forward. The incessant push continued until the standing man was fully seated within the pliant body beneath him. Panting lightly both men rocked into each other.

"I'll bring water next time too. You have to drink it. And you have to listen to these people. Please believe me Iruka-sensei. Listen to me and I'll get you out of here in one piece. I promise." Kakashi thrust brutally into Iruka.

Again and again and again and again.

Iruka screamed, for the first time in a long time, in true pleasure.

Imitation Kakashi smiled.

"Beautiful hair, chuunin. Pretty, pretty hair.

And the memories, the excessive rapes, the kindness and the pain, the cruelty and the pleasure began to replay in their minds.

FLASH.

Iruka screamed.

Kakashi screamed.

Swaying, Kakashi braced himself, trying to regain even a small amount of his confidence and composure. Even as an elite ninja, he wasn't used to feeling this unclean. He felt dirty and unclean. Iruka's emotions were still greatly affecting his own, and even so, the silver haired jounin knew the revulsion he felt, the uncleanliness, wasn't completely the result of the other man's influence.

Running purely on instinct, Kakashi pulled a kunai from its place on his leg and raised it to his hair which he held tight in his hand.

When both supposedly unconscious men jerked awake, screaming in pain, Ibiki and Tsunade found themselves unsure with the situation. These were both men well known for their composure, in one way or another.

Though both men stopped screaming, neither was composed and the identical looks of confusion and horror was had both professional shinobi a little fearful and increasingly curious.

Kakashi leaned back in the chair beside Iruka's hospital bed. Iruka leaned back in his bed and slid his hands through his hair, gathering it into one hand as a ponytail at the back of his neck. His other had fell back to the bed and with his shinobi reflexes, moved the hidden kunai up and through his hair.

Iruka's eyes met Kakashi's.

The silent echo in the room yelled at both men, haunting them. _Pretty hair. Beautiful hair. Pretty… pretty…beautiful, so beautiful….You have beautiful hair, chuunin._

Iruka's hair was not falling like a silky rain. Between his fingers and onto the sheets, his dark hair fell and scattered in an invisible wind.

Kakashi stayed paused with a kunai to his hair. The one gray eye still locked with the tormented chocolate eyes. The kunai lowered and the gaze of the other man followed the slow, deliberate movement.

Tsunade and Ibiki moved to disarm the chuunin, soothe him, and clean up the new disaster he had created.

The dark brown eyes slid once more up, and looked at Kakashi. The fear and revulsion that filled the once vibrant man was his fault. In more ways than one.

Seeing that Iruka was rather calm and not inclined to move, Tsunade and Ibiki glanced at Kakashi just in time to see the usually cold jounin slice off most of his hair with a kunai.

Something within Iruka relaxed and a look of relative peace entered his face. For the first time in a long time, Iruka slept well.

Kakashi sighed, _If this helps, _he looked at the course silver strands of his own hair slipping from between his fingers, _then that is worth the price._

He clenched his fist. _It had to be worth the price._

Another Author's Note: Read, review, love! Thank you to all my wonderful readers! Until next time!


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